


The Salvation of the Tearling

by blue_mushroom



Category: The Queen of the Tearling Series - Erika Johansen
Genre: Alternate Ending, Canon Divergent, F/M, Fix-It
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-21
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-02-28 00:55:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 33,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22825222
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blue_mushroom/pseuds/blue_mushroom
Summary: Kelsea receives Rowland's crown, however when faced with her choice and William Tear she decides not to go into the past nor future, but return right to the present moment to save her kingdom.
Relationships: Kelsea Glynn/Pen Alcott
Comments: 13
Kudos: 22





	1. Kelsea's Crown

**Author's Note:**

> This is an alternate ending so characters that didn't even make it to the keep in the ending of Fate of the Tearling may make it there. I hope that this will become a multiple chapter fic, exploring a different ending and wrapping up the arcs for the various characters and tying loose ends. This chapter is a short one.

Kelsea watched the mass of information, flowing in front of her, behind her. All at once she was trying to take it in, the weight of the crown on her head seemed to weigh her down, this was overwhelming. A voice cut through, interrupting her thoughts.

"There’s not much time.” 

She saw it all, the Tearling becoming the Mort, the village plagued by an unknown evil that lived among them. The crossing, Lily, Katie, Rowland, Gavin, she closed her eyes, for a moment she thought of going all the way back. But she thought of Simon, his words echoing in her head like the flowing sounds and images all rushing past her. It would be difficult, to fix William’s dream, maybe impossible. But so was raising the dead, and so was talking to a man who has been dead for centuries. Fixing the Tearling would be difficult, it would take her whole lifetime. But if anyone could do it, if it was possible, then it would be Kelsea. 

She closed her eyes and stood up, she was back in the keep, the door was about to burst, she had little time to glance at the faces of those around her. Father Tyler was doing his best to hurry along an injured Aisa, one arm lying limply as she was scooped into her mother’s arms. The Mace barking orders to hold the gate. Pen looked over as she stood, some of the others did too. If it was possible to change time, then it was possible to win this war. After all, Rowland Finn feared her for a reason. She cleared her voice. 

"Move away from the gate.”

Already she saw the defiance on her guards' faces but before The Mace could even open his mouth to argue before she silenced him with a glare. Now was not the time for them to question her, they would just have to trust her, she watched as they swallowed uncomfortably before hesitantly stepping back. Out of the corner of her eye, Kelsea saw the fear written across everyone's face the screaming and clawing of the gate only grew louder with each passing second. As if a hoard of rats were piling upon each other, clawing, scratching and screaming their way inside. Kelsea felt Pen's hand find the sleeve of her dress, tugging her back. But she couldn't swat him away now, she was far too distracted. 

She watched as the gate doors flung open in a huge splintering boom that seemed to shake the very stones of the floor. She felt her shoulder hit the ground as Pen pulled her away from the door but she paid it no mind as she sat up just in time to see them bursting into the keep. 

Dozens of pale paperwhite fleshy bodies, like those of drowned animals left in the water with skinny twisting, grasping limbs and outstretched fingers. Kelsea reached out, swinging her arm quickly as if to swat something away from herself. But what actually happened was far more important. It was as if an invisible force shot out from the young queen’s hand. The corrupted bodies of dead children froze for a mere fraction of a second before falling to the ground, twitching and kicking out. Like bugs Kelsea had seen sprayed with poison in Lily’s time before the crossing, jerking and squirming on their backs hissing out disgusting sounds. 

“Lady!” Mace yelled through the commotion, others in the room screamed in horror and fled, the gate guards were trembling in their boots as Kelsea once again found her feet. Already she felt a bout of energy had been taken from her body, the way she’d felt exhausted after conjuring up lightning and rain that one terrible night all those months ago. And yet she felt no anger at such a weakness, it was as if sending a wave over the land, far beyond the keep over the hills and valleys of the Tearling, reaching all the way to the trailing hills and arms of the Fairwitch mountains. And along with it, she felt the hundred and hundreds of pale dead bodies falling in twitching piles throughout the Tearling. Her Tearling. She would be as the Red Queen feared, she would tear through the land like a hurricane but she would succumb to the Queen of Spades no longer. She would do what she needed to do, she must, she could ensure a better future, not the ones she saw. She could carve one out, they all could. 

"Majesty! they're getting up again!" Kibb's deep bellowing voice broke Kelsea from her thoughts, drew her back to the present where a few of them once again struggled to their feet, a few turned their faces up, the faces that were once children were now no more than twisted tools in Rowland Finn's hands. A cursed existence if any conscious did still live within them.

A kindness. It would be doing them a kindness. 

"I know," Kelsea closed her eyes for a moment, she felt another surge leave her body but this time when she opened her eyes they lay still, motionless and eyes empty as death as their sad corpses stared up at the ceiling. Kelsea stumbled back, feeling herself caught up into Pen's arms, her back against the armor of his breastplate.

Kelsea could still hear terrified sobbing and gasps in the keep, confusing yelling. Everyone knew the Queen must have done it, but it didn't cease them from being shocked. 

"Majesty, are you alright?" Pen's concerned voice broke against Kelsea's ears like ocean waves. He was just as terrified as all the rest, his voice couldn't disguise it. He shifted Kelsea in his arms, one hand still clinging to his sword. 

"I cannot rest yet," Kelsea was slightly surprised to hear how winded her voice was. "He's angry, he's coming," She huffed out, looking down at her arms she noticed something that she'd missed. Her arms, they were no longer the slender perfectly tapered arms that Lily had, that she had taken on. Her birthmarks had returned, the tanned skin she'd gotten while hunting with Barty in a time that seemed lifetimes ago had returned, she was not so porcelain pale as Lily had been. Had she returned after placing that crown on her head? Had she come back to her own body? To plain-looking Kelsea? This wasn't something she could think about now.

"Who? Who is coming!? One of her guards yelled in alarm and Kelsea watched her loyal guard close in around her. How lucky she had been to inherit such a good guard. 

"Rowland Finn," The Fetch- no- Gavin spoke for her. Though it did little to quell the confusion and fear in the room. Looking around Kelsea saw that Father Tyler, Aisa, and Andalie had vanished, to deeper safer parts of the keep no doubt. Good.

"He cannot be killed- not even by you- we must get out of here!" Gavin urged desperately, his handsome face that had once caused her heart to melt so easily was pinched in concern. There was a desperation in his voice she would have never expected to hear when they first met. 

"Everyone can die, even you, and even him," Kelsea insisted. She was more powerful than the woman who had cursed him, and she was sure now that with his own crown she was beyond Rowland Finn. She swallowed harshly and braced herself against Pen's chest as she stood up straight again. She hoped she seemed more confident than she felt, as she'd learned before, she could be wrong and had been wrong many a time before. But she couldn't let them doubt her now, not with all their lives on the line, if this would be their end then she must give it her all until the very end. She had to try to give them an unseen future. 

"You must reconsider-" Kelsea cut Gavin off with a glare. 

"If you and your men must run then run, if my guards must run then they may run, but I'm not finished yet," And she wouldn't be, not until she was dead, or Rowland Finn was. She took a deep breath and watched as Gavin quieted down, she was glad he stayed. If this turned sour he was a valuable ally, he should see this to the end just the way Kelsea had to. He and all his men. Gavin was quiet, in fact save for a few quiet sobs and sniffles the room went silent, but in no way was there relief. It felt tenser than anything else Kelsea had ever felt, the air was thick with dread and fear, she felt a bead of sweat roll down her forehead and plop onto her collar bone. 

"Majesty, it was an honor to know you," Mace's voice was calm, not barking orders, not critical. Kelsea didn't like it, it was too sincere, she looked over and saw him facing straight ahead, his weapon of choice firmly in his hands. His jaw was set, his ruggedly handsome face was stern. As much as she agreed, that she was so grateful to have all her guard she couldn't she knew if she was going to say something like that she'd break. And everyone would see that she was just as afraid as she was determined. 

"We'll see if you still feel that way after all of this is said and done Lazarus," She cracked half of a smile and watched as he closed his eyes only for a moment and nodded. 

It was then that a gust of hot wind burst in through the destroyed gate doors, a collective gasp went through the room, and Kelsea sheltered her eyes with her forearm. It was like opening an oven if the oven was the size of the gate, she felt her dark hair played with slightly by the hot wind. Opening her eyes only made things worse as it revealed thick clouds of billowing black smoke blowing into the keep, hot and painful. Coughing filled the room and Kelsea also felt her throat burn and her eyes sting, irritated tears rolling down her face. Behind her, she felt Pen's chest tremble as the guard coughed and winced. 

Slowly the smoke began to thin, revealing sparks and fire in the gate, remaining still not spreading as slowly an outline of the figure standing in their midst was revealed.


	2. The King of the Tearling

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kelsea confronts the greatest threat to her Kingdom

As the smoke began to clear the figure in the midst of his circle of flames took a step forward. Rowland’s eyes seemed to burn through the smoke, brighter than the sparks that flitted through the room. As he appeared now he seemed more striking than ever, his slender handsome form seemed to give off a presence far greater than his actual physical form.

Apparently, Kelsea wasn’t the only one who felt the chill go through the room like a ripple through water. The guards had all fallen silent, they had never seen Rowland Finn before, they probably only had the vaguest idea of who he was. And yet the anger emanating from him was tangible. They probably saw a terrifying mysterious figure, fire licking at his feet though he remained unharmed. But Kelsea knew better, she knew Rowland Finn perhaps as well as anybody because she knew him through Katie’s eyes. 

Kelsea watched as a long slender hand reached out, his pale skin in stark contrast to the smoke rising around him. The same hand that had been pressed against her collarbone that night they met, the first time he’d tried to get her to lift the curse placed on him all those centuries ago. 

“My crown,” Those sharp eyes narrowed, practically boring a hole right through Kelsea’s form. She felt a shiver run down her spine, she bit her lower lip but stayed standing firm. 

“It may have been once, but no longer,” Kelsea drew herself up a bit, she felt Pen release her dress sleeve in the back of her mind. Part of her wondered why Katie hadn’t killed him, why she’d let him off with nothing but a curse. 

Rowland’s face darkened, no doubt because Kelsea was thinking of Katie. “You should have never been banished, you should have died for what you did, even then,” Kelsea asserted, as she spoke she felt the sapphires that lay against her chest burn once again. But never had they burned like this, not even the night Kelsea had cut off all her hair to seek out the cages. It seemed that even Row’s own sapphire had betrayed him as it burned like fire against her chest as if it was second heart. 

“I’ve seen it all, I know what you really are,” As much as Kelsea felt exhausted from her earlier burst of magic she summoned her strength to from the depths of her bones and stepped towards Rowland Finn. 

Kelsea watched as the ring of flames that had once only encircled Row widened, gate guards hurried backward from the flames and the Queen’s guards looked around nervously, Kelsea could already see the Mace forming his next order before it met his lips. She moved away from Pen, stepping quickly through the flames, and though they licked at her dress and legs she felt no burning. For a moment she heard the concerned yelling from her guards before all other sound seemed to go silent. Through the flickering wall, she saw the mouths move of her guards but she couldn’t hear what they said, she turned her attention to Rowland. His handsome face did little to hide the malice in his heart, he seemed now like the ugliest creature ever conceived, hiding behind a painted mask. 

“You hate this Tearling so much, you’ve already destroyed it once,” Kelsea felt the sapphires against her chest as if her words had inflamed them further.

Rowland Finn remained unmoved, silent. He’d been asked this before, he’d never been swayed before and he wasn’t interested in explaining himself. Not now, not ever. Kelsea should have known better than to bother asking. Centuries had passed since he’d first been banished and yet he’d not repented, he’d not changed his mind. And he probably never would he’d spent dozens upon dozens of years reinforcing whatever twisted foolish hatred he’d had. 

“Everyone’s dead! Your father, your mother, your brother -Katie! They’re all gone, there’s nothing left for you to destroy here!” Kelsea found the strength to yell at him, he’d caused so much pain, so many deaths and suffering of countless people. 

Rowland only offered a slight, dark wicked smile in return. “And you? Do you plan on being next, perhaps we could make an arrangement, if only you’d return my crown,” His body language relaxed, his shoulders lowering, his brows softening. But it did little to ease the tension, to quell the fear and anger within Kelsea’s heart. 

Kelsea shook her head, one hand reached up protectively to the crown on her head. 

“No, I know you Row, you don’t share,”

Hearing that phrase said again was enough, Row’s eyes widened, sharp and furious the fire that surrounded him burst with renewed life. Kelsea watched as flames rushed towards her, instinctively she screamed and sheltered her face with her arms, closing her eyes and ducking her head back. But the flames never met her, she opened her eyes only to see blue smoke rising around her. The sapphires now burned against her chest in a different way, the way ice burned one’s hand and stung the eyes. She gasped, she’d been sure she was about to die, to burn to death and let her Kingdom fall. She panted, her green eyes wide with shock. 

When Kelsey finally looked up Rowland looked just as confused but more than that he looked angry. Perhaps that is why he’s asked for the crown first, he couldn’t take it from her, not with both of her sapphires and the crown. He may have his own magic but he was outmatched, perhaps for the first time in his life. 

“You could have been better!” Kelsea felt herself screaming, he could have been great, he could have risen past his father’s mistakes. He could have been like his half brother, he could have worked to make the budding Tearling better, to build a strong foundation and carry on the knowledge from the crossing instead of burying it with those that crossed. 

“Even your father knew it! He was proud of you!” Kelsea felt the sapphires burn so strongly that she was tempted to make sure her dress wasn’t caught ablaze. The man that stood across from her now seemed small, a spoiled child throwing a tantrum. Someone who would never let if anyone else be happy if he couldn’t. Insufferable selfish and unchangeable. He had no desire to help her build a new Tearling. Maybe he thought he’d loved Katie but he’d only ever loved himself. 

And for the first time, Kelsea saw fear in his eyes, even when she’d seen through Katie’s eyes and memories she had never seen Rowland afraid, hurt, angry and betrayed she had seen before. But now he looked genuinely afraid, his sculpted face had fallen. His lips were pressed together, and for a moment Kelsea thought of giving him mercy. But they had done that before to no avail. 

Mercy was probably what he was counting on, seeing as he’d always managed to get by, evil act after evil act. And Kelsea was tempted to give it to him, she thought of Arlene Thorne, and the death she had given him, which had felt so justified in that terrible moment as the crowd screamed and roared. It had left her feeling sick and regretful, like him Rowland should be put on trial. But it was far too dangerous, he was too dangerous to be left alive, he would hurt again and again. 

“Do you have anything to say to me?” Kelsea asked after a tense moment. “Anything to say as to why you’ve done this?”

“I have nothing to say,” Once again Rowland’s eyes were dark but he didn’t send another burst of flames her way, he didn’t twist his shape into some terrible beast and even the fear that had flashed across his face earlier was fast fading.

“Perhaps if we do meet again someday that will be different,” If what William Tear had said was true they would all meet again one day, but until then he could answer to his father and to his brother. 

"Perhaps," 

In an instant, the flames were extinguished and Kelsea heard her guards rushing towards her, she'd felt another burst of energy leave her as she sank to her knees. Looking across from her she saw the form of Rowland Finn sprawled out against the ground, crumpled. She'd stopped his heart, it took a tremendous amount of focus to end the life of someone who was thought to be immortal. 

As her vision blurred Kelsea saw the Mace's large scarred hands taking hold of her, making sure she wouldn't hit her head on the stones of the floor. It was over, she had done it, she had saved her kingdom from the Red Queen, she'd saved them from Rowland Finn, it was going to be alright. She felt tears of relief falling down her face and the sapphires on her chest finally began to cool down. She felt herself sink into someone's arms as shouting filled the room.

"Is the queen alright?!" A voice rang out, blurry against Kelsea's ears. 

"Is that- is Rowland dead?" One of the Fetch's men called out, Kelsea parted her lips to try an answer, to explain that he was gone, she'd felt the very life leave him. But her words escaped her and her heavy eyelids finally closed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is another short one but it felt like a good place for the story to break. I hope it wasn't too anticlimactic I didn't want to get too graphic about the death though it will be mentioned later. 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading and please let me know what you think if you have a moment.


	3. The Queen Awakens

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kelsea awakens in the aftermath of Rowland Finn's death

Slowly Kelsea opened her eyes, she had to blink a few times, squinting the blurriness out of her eyes as feeling returned back to her limbs. She felt as if her limbs were filled with lead, and her head and neck ached with exhaustion. She parted her lips and slowly sat up, pushing her self up to find that she was in her bedroom, in her own bed. She let out a loud groan, wiping her eyes with her hand, looking up to see Mace sitting in a chair across the room. 

“Lazarus?” Kelsea asked, her voice sounded just as confused and groggy as she felt. But she didn't mind she was in her own room now, she didn't have to put on a brave face. 

"Yes, Majesty?" The Mace looked up at her but he didn't get up from his seat. He stretched one booted leg out in front of him. 

"I'm glad that you're alright, how is everyone?" Kelsea rubbed her head to see the scar on her arm had returned, so perhaps she hadn't been mistaken earlier. 

"Everyone is fine Majesty, it's been two days that you have been asleep now," The mace explained as he watched the queen push aside her blankets and move to the side of her bed, dropping her feet down onto the stone floor. 

"And what about out there? Are the people demanding for my head on a post yet?" She asked. She had no idea what it was like out on the streets right now. Did her people even know she had returned from Mortemese or did they believe she was dead or still held as a prisoner? She felt her stomach twist, there was so much to be done. 

"No lady, I think you'll find there are many more songs being sung of you, even as they mourn the dead, had you not destroyed those things the losses we face would be far greater," 

Kelsea swallowed, turning away from her crown which was sitting on her little bedside table and looked at the Mace. She grabbed her arm in her hand, her chest felt tight. She'd thought a storm of hatred might fall upon her, for leaving her kingdom, leaving them vulnerable from attacks from the Mort and from Rowland. Her stomach twisted at the thought of Row. She felt her heavy eyelids droop, her face pinched together as her eyes welled up with tears. Tears of relief. 

"They think it was me who stopped Row's children then?" She asked, wiping at her eyes which had begun to quietly overflow onto her cheeks. 

"They don't think, they know, how many of them actually believe it and how many believe it was some miracle I don't know," The Mace nodded sternly, this could be a problem if the people thought the queen was a miracle worker, but it wouldn't have been the first time. An entire crowd had seen what she had done to Arlene Thorne. 

Kelsea nodded in return, she would need a lot of time to take this all in, she couldn't decide how to feel about it all just yet. On the other hand, she knew she didn't just have time to sit and ponder and sort out her feelings, she never did. She'd always have more pressing matters ahead of her. 

"Lazarus, what is that smell in the air?" She asked hesitantly, not sure if she wanted to hear the answer but she had an ugly feeling in her gut already. 

"They've been burning the corpses of those things for two days now, it's been a massive cleanup effort from soldiers to citizens alike, hauling them off into burn piles," The Mace explained, his scarred nose pinched in irritation at bringing the matter up. 

"And what about Row Finn? What did you do with his body?" Kelsea asked, her voice was slightly quieter than it had been before. It was still extremely surreal to her, the thought of Row Finn being dead and gone, no wonder she was still feeling exhausted. It had taken an incredible amount from her. 

"He was burned with his creatures in one of the burn pits," Lazarus asked raising a dark eyebrow. "Why is there a problem, Majesty?"

"No, that suits him, he always had a touch for fire anyway," Kelsea pushed back a lock of her dark hair, tangled from being in bed for so long. 

"Who was he? You called him Rowland Finn," The Mace asked. 

Kelsea looked at Lazarus, "I promise I'll explain, but just not now," she gave him a tired look. Hopefully, he could be patient, she just couldn't get into it all right now, not without a bath and a big meal first. "For now I need to wash up and gather myself," 

The Mace stood up and nodded moving towards the door of her chambers. "I'll fetch Andalie, though I'm sure she already knows,"

"Only if she's free, I'll be fine on my own if she's busy, she and her children have been through a lot, as have we all," Kelsea turned to enter her bathroom as she heard the door close as the Mace left. 

The bathroom mirror revealed what she had already suspected. She was back, no longer in the body of Lily but in her own. She looked the way she had when she had left her cottage leaving Carlin and Barty behind. Her face had returned to being more plump and round, her lips fuller and her nose upturned just a bit more than she would have liked. Her figure too had returned, Lily's slender elegant body had left her in a dress that now felt a bit too tight. Her more full figure was back and bringing attention to it made her breasts feel tight against the dress made for Lily's figure. She touched her neck where the hawk had attacked her before and felt a rush of different emotions. She was back in her own familiar body, a body that felt safer to her like she was back home. But she knew she was not a beauty- not a stunning beauty the way Lily had been. How Lily had turned heads and sparked desire in the hearts of others but she had also paid for such beauty. 

Kelsea hadn't been able to understand why Margarete saw her beauty as a curse, she had known it must have come with detractions but physical beauty was something so many men and women alike coveted. Something Kelsea had wanted for herself as well. She would no longer turn heads the way Margarete did as she walked through the halls of the keep. Kelsea wasn't sure if she would miss having Lily's appearance, only time could tell. She mentally scolded herself for staring in the mirror for too long. She had a kingdom facing a crisis, at the end of an invasion, she needed to rebuild and regroup her kingdom and her people. And yet here she was worrying about her figure. How selfish of her, it was disgusting. 

"You're too hard on yourself, everyone thinks of themselves sometimes, even royalty," Andalie's voice broke Kelsea away from her own thoughts as she turned to see her maid of chamber setting a tray of water and biscuits down on a counter next to the tub. Kelsea's own insight into the minds and hearts of other people must be waning, for she hadn't sensed her come in. Her old body was back and her sapphire induced magic seemed faded, she was curious as to what was happening, in part she was fearful. The sapphires had saved her life and her kingdom, she had begun to rely on their powers and felt safe with them. The thought of them returning to simple stones the way they had been for her mother was terrifying. But perhaps it was for the best, she didn't want to become the Queen of Spades. She didn't want to become her great aunt, the Red Queen. 

"Your mind is spinning, Lady, you're already exhausted, be careful that you don't faint," Andalie's voice once again pulled Kelsea back as she heard her filling the tub. Kelsea nodded, she was so glad to have Andalie here, that she and her children were safe. They may not have the closest relationship but being away from her court and imprisoned had made everyone she had in her court seem all the more precious to her. She'd thought she may have never seen them again. 

"You're right, thank you," Kelsea began stripping off the dress that no longer fit her before slipping into the bath the other woman had drawn. Andalie was only a few years older than herself and yet they had lived lives apart, she was grateful to have her loyalty. Kelsea sank down, letting her tangled dark hair soak in the bath as her neck and shoulders melted into the bath. She felt like she could fall asleep again right then and there. 

"Shall I wait for you to call me to do your hair Lady?" Andalie poured a glass of water from the pitcher she had brought. She'd known that after being asleep for two days Kelsea would probably feel like she could drink a gallon of water and eat enough for two men. 

"Yes, but before you go," Kelsea paused for a moment. "Thank you for staying here, I thought I may have never gotten to see you again," Kelsea said honestly. 

"I knew you'd return, we waited for you back here," Andalie's voice was a bit softer than her usual cool demeanor. "Call for me when you would like me to do your hair, my lady," And with that she quietly dismissed herself. 

Kelsea nodded and leaned over first taking a sip and then proceeding to drink down the entire glass of water. She hadn't realized how parched she'd been left but two days without water, it seemed about right. She didn't even mind eating in the bathroom as she grabbed a biscuit now feeling as hungry as she actually was. She finished the biscuit and returned to soaking in the bath, the sapphires reflecting specs of blue light onto the bathwater and her skin. She closed her eyes and stretched one leg out, resting her foot against the wall. 

Maybe Andalie was right, she could at least afford herself a bath without tearing her hair out about everything she needed to take care of and figure out. She let out a deep breath, audibly sighing as if she could try and breathe out all the stress that plagued her. If she ran herself into the ground she couldn't be there to steer her kingdom. When Andalie returned to wash and untangle her hair Kelsea was barely blinking the exhaustion out of her eyes, trying to stay awake. 

Kelsea got dressed in one of her older dresses that fit her better and managed to stumble back into her bed, sitting down and resting her head against the headboard. She closed her eyes and got a glimpse of Rowland Finn, his knees giving way beneath him, his body going slack and hitting the floor in a crumple. She blinked and opened her eyes, rubbing her forehead. It was almost like she could feel the life leaving him all over again, his heartbeat slowing to a stop as if it was beating in her hand. 

"Andalie, please fetch Lazarus I need to speak with him in here," She wasn't feeling well enough yet to step down into her throne room but that didn't mean she couldn't get to work from here. She needed information and she needed to pass on a message to her generals. 

She watched Andalie nod before slipping out the door and looked over to the side, looking out of her window. She saw tendrils of smoke rising up through the pale sky and she frowned thinking of the piles of white mangled corpses that may be burning beneath them.


	4. The Queen's Council

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the queen recovers, she begins making plans for the recovery of the kingdom while reflecting on the current and past state of the Tearling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is much longer than the others, I really hope it isn't boring or slow. I hope you will enjoy, thank you.

Kelsea sat at her table for the first time since it had all happened. It had been only four days since the death of Rowland Finn, but of course, she'd been asleep for two of them. She still felt the exhaustion deep in her bones as she walked and talked. She wondered if this is what it had been like when William Tear had died at sea the way he did. Drained by his own magic to the point of return. As much as she had begun to rely on the sapphires they were not limitless power. Not even for William who had been able to open up an entire doorway with his single sapphire. Though she didn't look physically drained, not the way Maddy had when she returned from the sea, when no amount of food would replenish her. She could only imagine how that could have felt, or how much power it must have taken from them both to try and open the doorway. Even if she wanted to, she doubted she would have been able to do it, maybe Rowland would have been able to if he had both the sapphires and his crown along with his own magic he'd been developing off in the Fairwitch.

"Majesty?" 

Kelsea blinked, realizing she'd been drifting off, staring at the table in front of her. She shook her head, knowing that she wasn't wearing her crown- or perhaps it was Rowland's crown. 

"Are you alright, your majesty?" It was Father Tyler's familiar kindly voice. Kelsea looked at him, the old man looked more frail and pale than he had when she had been taken away to the mort. What had happened to him while she was away? 

"Yes, I'm fine, I've had a headache on and off since the battle at the keep gate, that's all," She gave the man an earnest smile. She'd never thought in her wildest dreams she'd end up considering a priest of all people, to be a friend. And while she had no taste for his religion she enjoyed their talks and their discussions of books and a shared love of reading. She patted the old man's hand lightly before turning back to her meal and looking up at the table. Eating with her knights again was so oddly familiar it felt surreal sitting here with them all, especially after everything she had seen. "Sorry, I didn't mean to make anyone worry," She put out her hands in a form of apology upon seeing the concerned looks she was getting, for a moment Pen looked unconvinced before he turned back to his breakfast, Kelsea decided not let her eyes linger on her former close guard. 

"I must thank you for what you did Father, I know that finding and returning that crown did not come without consequence, I am genuinely grateful," Kelsea said honestly, she wondered what would happen when she would put it on again. Would she see William Tear again? Would Row be there? She had no idea what she should expect, hence why she decided she wouldn't wear it this morning, she would put it on before any meetings with the public as was expected. 

"Well I would not have made it back to you without the help of our young Aisa, I've never met a child with so much courage," The child finding him had been a godsend, he would have never escaped that terrible place had she not. He only wished he'd been able to escape with Seth's body, he had faced so much shame before his death. It felt like a failure not to give him at least a proper burial. Though many would be burying their dead, his grief was hardly unique, nor was the suffering he had endured, in fact, he knew he faced much less than many others. He watched the queen as she ate, her appearance had likened to the way she had been when they had first met upon her coronation. What had she been through during her time in Mortemese? It was a cruel and godless place, and she would have been their most despised prisoner. What sort of abuse had she endured while she was away from them? And yet she sat there proud and strong even when she felt weak. Though faithless as she was Tyler decided they could not ask for a better queen. She really was the True Queen of the Tearling. 

"Where is Aisa? She isn't with us, I noticed," Kelsea asked, looking around. 

"Resting with her mother, she was injured, her arm is infected and swollen, but even had it not been I imagine the girl would have been tired," The Mace explained with a stern voice, Father Tyler nodded. The child had become loved among them all, as if she was a daughter or a little sister among the guard. For some reason, the girl's fighting spirit had resonated within their group, no one wanted her ill, no one wanted her to succumb to her infection. 

Kelsea immediately frowned, Andalie had not mentioned that her child had an infection. The queen bit her lip, they would have to ensure her recovery, aside from the fact Kelsea wouldn't want this child to die for the obvious reasons, Andalie was an incredible ally to her, and her children were more important to her than anything. If Kelsea ever had her own children one day as she had once proclaimed as she saw her uncle's head on a stake she would feel the same way. 

"Gavin," The Fetch who had been sitting silently at the end of the table suddenly looked up, it was so different than their first and only playful dinner together. "I know that you have acquired much in your time, resources and connections alike, I will require your help moving forward with this Kingdom, and believe you owe me as much for withholding crucial information," Her voice was stern, serious. But it didn't get a rise out of the man, he only dipped his head in quiet agreement, cocky attitude diminished. She decided to continue to scold him or berate him, though she didn't feel bad either, the shame he felt was his own. And when he could have shared all the information she needed with her he had instead decided to mock her blossoming beauty. A beauty which was now gone, if she had been pettier she would have dared him to call her plain again. To see if she would care at all. 

"We need medicine for the child, quickly," Her voice was stern but urgent. Infection was what killed people, even more so than wounds. And Aisa was a child. 

"I shall take my leave after our meal," The fetch spoke and everyone listened curiously, since still so little was known about him. And even though he now walked around with his face in full view it did little to shed any light on who he really was. He and his men kept to themselves and speaking only as much as was necessary to the others. Which had only made them more mysterious and raise questions of just how exactly the queen seemed to know them so well. 

"Today I will hold a speech from my balcony to all who will listen, I need to address my kingdom in the aftermath of such a crisis. If we don't start leading them chaos may come about, and I plan to do right by my people. I have already made many mistakes," Kelsea explained to her table of allies and friends. 

"Our immediate concern is the security of the border and the safe disposal of the dead," She continued. She'd sent out a message to her generals to be on the lookout, the Red Queen's dictatorship had fallen apart and her army had been thirsty for invasion. And yet now there was a void of power in the Mort and they too had been invaded by Rowland's children. They may be very well dealing with their own crisis- no Kelsea was sure they were- but she didn't plan to let her guard down if she was wrong. She'd been wrong before and she would be again no doubt. 

"However I plan on forming a new council, one that will advise me, bring issues to my attention and provide me with a voice from the kingdom, as we rebuild I would like to decide upon different regions of this kingdom," She paused, seeing that she had gotten the attention of her peers. She took a sip of her water before deciding to continue. 

"I would like the people from those regions, to the best of their abilities, to choose someone to represent them, to speak on their behalf as a council member," She knew it was a lot to ask for. For now, it would be an advisory committee. But she wasn't handpicking the members, it would be the very beginnings of introducing a democratic system. The people would choose who they wanted to represent their district. There was no system in place yet, it would be messy and not nearly as many people would participate as she wanted but it was a start. 

If she could she would slowly introduce the systems the Tearling so desperately needed, a court system, accessible education, perhaps even a parliament. She knew that by creating these things each time she would be relinquishing a bit of her power to them, that was the only way they would work. But it was what needed to be done, what the Tearling should have been from the beginning, the way it was when it was that little town living in isolation with their town meetings. She would be warned against this, but she would much rather relinquish her power than continue a system that was so broken. Kings and Queens of the precrossing world had often clung onto their extreme power until death- at the hands of their own people. Even the Red Queen, who everyone believed was immortal had watched her grip on her kingdom loosen and fade. Fear didn't derive true loyalty, nor was it justified. 

"As we recover it will be important to hear from all corners of the kingdom," She decided to finish talking and focus on finishing her meal. 

"Then we will see that you have all the assistance you need, Majesty," The Mace nodded, he could see that she was serious about this, she was ever an idealist. She was less naive now than she had been but it seemed in her heart she was still that girl they'd taken from the cottage. She had not become the other Kelsea, the one who had brutally executed Thorne in a display anger-filled bloodshed. 

Kelsea nodded and stood from the table. She watched as the Fetch stood up as well, the locked eyes for a moment and she saw that something was on his mind, brewing just beneath the surface. He had something to ask her, but Kelsea had a feeling she wouldn't like what it was. He nodded at her before quickly turning on his heel and heading out. Kelsea watched him for a moment but out of the corner of her eyes, she saw Pen, looking at her, almost as if he was about to getup as well but he remained sitting. 

A habit, they had both gotten used to him as her close guard and even now it was strange being back in the keep without him as her ever-present shadow. It was of no disrespect to her other guards that she wanted him as her close guard, of course, it wasn't. 

"I'm going to see Andalie and Aisa, have someone spread the word that the queen will be speaking today," Kelsea needed to stay focused on what was most important, and it wasn't her personal life. 

Kelsea arrived in front of Andalie's chambers and she was about to knock when she paused, hearing Andalie's voice call out from within the room. 

"No need to knock, Lady, you can come in," Kelsea should have known Andalie would have seen her coming. She opened the door and stepped inside. Andalie was at the bedside of Aisa, her youngest was on her lap as she stroked through Aisa's hair. 

"I didn't know she was sick," Kelsea let herself walk in, she saw concern in Andalie's eyes she glanced away from her daughter to look at Kelsea for a moment before turning back. Kelsea knelt down next to the girl's bed, hesitantly reaching out to put her hand on the child's. She didn't know the girl personally, the guards knew her better. Kelsea had remembered her at first for fighting with Margarete during lessons. 

"Father Tyler told me how you rescued him, that was incredibly brave of you," Kelsea watched as the child looked at her nodded, her face was flushed with fever. 

"I couldn't just leave him there," The little girl explained, her voice was soft and tired. 

"You've got the heart of knight, you're as brave as all of my guards," Kelsea gave a small smile. But she felt guilt inside of her, this child had already had such a difficult life. It was shameful that they lived in a world that had allowed this to happen. She watched as the child nodded. "And I promise we are getting you medicine, you'll feel better soon," Kelsea tried to reassure the girl but she could tell she wasn't believed. Everyone knew how deadly the infection was. 

"The doctor should be here by the end of the day," Kelsea said more to Andalie than her daughter as she stood up again. Aisa was tired, and Kelsea should let her rest with her mother and her siblings. Andalie nodded, running her hands delicately though her daughter's hair. "I'll you rest, I just wanted to thank you for what you did for the Father, thank you," 

"Thank you, Majesty," Kelsea smiled as she heard the little girl's voice speak softly. She felt a pang in her heart. Hopefully, she would pull through, please. Kelsea took her leave, being sure to close the door quietly. She sighed once outside, she'd seen enough suffering. She didn't want to see this girl die. She pushed a hand through her long dark hair and returned to her chambers.

She closed the door behind her as she walked through what was once her mother's room. She looked over at the Alcove where Pen had stayed, the curtain that had separated them was pushed off to the side. His things were gone and the area was empty. In the privacy of her room, Kelsea let herself linger there for a moment. His things must have been moved out while she was asleep, or more likely during her time in Mortemese, since he'd already made up his mind to end their affair and his time as her close guard. She took a moment to stand next to where Pen's cot had been, she sighed. 

She had so many questions about it, she knew the reason he had given her was good enough. But it didn't stop her from being curious- from having unanswered questions. His work was important to him, most important and she respected that, she admired that. Because she also had to put her kingdom before anything else and anyone else. Maybe he had enjoyed his time away from her while she was kept prisoner, or maybe the mysterious other woman meant more to him than Kelsea had first suspected. She couldn't demand answers from him, she had no right to push the issue, even if it hurt. Even though he had said he loved her even as he called their affair off. Had he just said it as an attempt to hurt her less? 

"Ugh!" Kelsea let out a huff as she gathered herself again. She didn't have time to think about this now, she had work to do. She walked over to her closet, it was pretty empty, but that was because it was far bigger than she would have ever needed. Her mother must have owned so many dresses, far more than Kelsea had ever had, or ever planned to. She had found things of her mother still here, of course, a necklace or a pair of earrings. The mother she had once so admired, now she knew she was simply in hiding. Well so long as she was still alive, if Row's children had gotten to her home then... 

Kelsea shook her head and grabbed out one of her older dresses, one that was fit to Kelsea's body and not Lily's. It was more formal than what she had worn to breakfast, in her preferred black. But it did have a more elegant, trim on the wrists and the neckline. She got changed, adjusting the sapphires that adorned her chest to make sure they laid nicely against her. Just in case anyone thought she wasn't really the Queen, but at least her eyes and her voice had always remained the same. She was still herself, she had always been and now she felt more like Kelsea than ever. She hoped that if Barty and Carlin could see her now that they would be proud of the queen they raised, of the woman they raised. 

She moved to the vanity and sat down to brush her hair, she wouldn't disturb Andalie, she could do her hair herself. Andalie had enough on her plate to handle. She brushed her hair back in wide sweeping strokes pulling her dark locks back to tie a bun at the back of her head. Her face looked slimmer with her hair down, but she thought a more striking appearance might be better suited for today.

She tucked a stray strand of hair back and looked over at the crown. It's many sapphires winked and shimmered playfully even in the lower light of her room. It seemed to carry a bit of Row's smug darkness, maybe a bit of him which had been evil but charismatic had seeped into his handiwork. Or maybe it was just Kelsea's perception that made it seem that way. She grabbed it in her hands, holding onto its gorgeous silver sides. She closed her eyes, she didn't want to see Row, or anyone, as much as she wanted answers she didn't want to see the face of the man who had killed so many. The man she'd just watched as his face paled, knowing he was beaten but too proud to beg, his sharp deep eyes flash with emotion before closing as his brows furrowed together. His hair fell over his forehead and the very same moment Kelsea felt his breathing stop as his heart slowed and he sank to the ground. He was vile and cruel, but perhaps no one looked that way when they were facing their own death. The Red Queen certainly hadn't. 

Kelsea gritted her teeth as she set the crown on her head, closing her eyes for a moment and bracing herself. She waited, and nothing happened. She felt relief rush over and she sighed loudly. Thank goodness. She took one last look at herself in the mirror before standing up and leaving her chambers, striding swiftly to the balcony, hopefully, everything would be ready by now. She wanted to say what she felt, she didn't want to spend too much time overthinking and making her speech flowery and meaningless. 

As she approached her balcony she saw her guards standing at attention, and already she could hear the buzz of people talking. She felt a rush of nerves but reminded herself that she had faced down the Red Queen alone. She'd been beaten and mocked and had disgusting things hurled at her as she was paraded through the Mort like a hunting a prize. A crowd of her own people was well withing her ability to manage, she'd done it before. 

She stepped out onto the balcony where her herald stood waiting to announce her. As she stepped out onto the balcony she saw the keep lawn packed shoulder to shoulder with people, a roar of voices went up at her appearance. She felt a cool wind meet her skin and played gently with the skirt of her dress and a few stray strands of hair. The roars and screams filled the air with excitement, they were happy to see her. Kelsea felt her heart skip a beat. 

As the herald stepped forward the voices quieted to a low rumble, "The Glynn Queen! Returned from the Prisons of Mortemese!" The herald's voice boomed over the crowd and he gestured widely. A surge of cheers and shouts immediately followed, and Kelsea could now see why. From her people's eyes, she had given herself up, handed herself over to the Red Queen and somehow turned the entire invasion away from the Tearling. And now she was back, even though she should be dead. Kelsea waited for the cheers to die down as the herald gestured for quiet. She stepped forward, placing her hands on the railing of the balcony. 

"I have returned to you all from Mortemese! We have turned away the invasion of the fierce Mort military!" She paused after her sentence to let her people cheer grateful calls of happiness before continuing. 

"We have turned away the Mort! We no longer are slave to the barbaric practice of the lottery! Never again will our people be stolen to meet torture and death in the Mort! No longer will our children be carted off in cages under fear of invasion, we, our Tearling have defeated the Mort!" The screams that followed threatened to deafen Kelsea with their loudness, people threw their hands up into the air and others cried with joy and surely some cried with sadness. Their victory did not erase the great tragedy of the Lottery or of the first or second invasion. It was a good long few minutes before the cries died down enough for Kelsea to speak again. 

"We no longer bow our heads to the Red Queen, for I myself have killed the Queen of the Mort!" Another cheer, shocked and elated. For she was thought to be wicked and immortal, and while Kelsea hadn't killed her under the circumstances they probably thought of that was ok. They could believe that she murdered the queen and stole back her freedom. They didn't need to know it had been an act of compassion, they had no compassion for her, the woman who had stolen family members and practically sentenced them to death. 

"We can not be defeated by the once immortal Red Queen, nor the hordes of hell set upon us! Our Tearling is free!" Another round of cheers went up, Kelsea resisted the urge to wince at the sheer volume of the crowd. She felt her heart racing from it all, the nerves, the excitement, and proclamation of a hard-won victory. 

"We together shall rebuild our Tearling! We shall arise and make our kingdom stronger and better than ever it was before!" Kelsea chose her words deliberately, no longer would she call it "her" Tearling. It was theirs together, she did not own her people and she had no right to own this entire kingdom. Despite what everyone would tell her. 

"And with your help, I promise you we shall rebuild after this disaster. I can ask for no better a court, and no better kingdom! We are already working towards our shared future, listen well for new from the Keep- we have much to say and much to do!" Kelsea stood and watched her people cheer and shout before letting go of the railing, deciding that her speech was done, she took a deep breath, no realizing how tense she was from the speech. The herald cleared his voice, taking Kelsea by surprise. 

"Our Glynn Queen, True Queen and Saviour of the Tearling!" Shouts rose up as he spoke but soften as he suddenly knelt, dipping his head down. Kelsea was startled by the action and showed on her face. Saviour? She looked out over the balcony and saw as the crowd that was packed on the keep lawn slowly lowered as the dozens- no perhaps hundreds of people knelt and dipped their heads. Kelsea's heart stopped for a moment and a breath caught in her throat. The last time she'd seen this many people was when she arrived on the front with her guards, around her military and the military of the Mort. She felt her throat tighten at the sight, these people had been through so much, she had feared and desired their approval and wanted to try in earnest to be the best queen she could for them. She nodded her head, biting her lip and closing her eyes for a moment as she felt tears welling up in her eyes. A tear rolled down her cheek, cold in the cool outside air. 

She turned on her heel as the herald rose to his feet and she took her exit as she heard her people cheering again. The Mace closed the doors to the balcony behind her and she paused to wipe her face for a moment. Kelsea looked up suddenly when she felt a large hand clap down on her shoulder roughly, and looking up she saw it belonged to The Mace. He had an ever so slight smile on his stern face. 

"Thank you Lazarus, I'm alright," She finished wiping her face and looked at her guards with a bit of a smile. 

"You cry more about returning home than you did when you left for the mort," Dyer's voice teased and Kelsea shook her head a bit. She couldn't deny it so she cracked a smile and laughed, of all times to cry she did now.


	5. The Fetch's Request

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Fetch returns to give Aisa's doctor the resources he has, but he has a request for the Queen.

Kelsea rubbed her forehead as she took one last look at the map laid out on the table before her. Of course, her advisors had warned her against these plans and she doubted the nobility of the kingdom would ever be on board. Though she couldn't help but wonder if these recent events had shaken the upper class. Or if they would be gripping onto their feudalistic ideas tighter than ever. On the map laid out before them were new borders drawn out across the kingdom. New districts to represent their regions. Not just the nobility but the lower classes, the common man- and the common woman. If this started to work the way Kelsea hoped, then everyone from the field farmer to the noble, to the prostitute could have a say on the state of their kingdom. 

Kelsea could only hope that all of this rebuilding and change would inspire a renewed sense of community in the Tearling. The way that town had started off, where everyone came together- their town meetings, their shared harvest. But the skeptical faces looking back at her made Kelsea second guess every choice she had. The discussion had been lengthy- should the areas be divided by population or by area? What natural landmarks should indicate the borders? 

"Well then, get this to the cartographers, we'll need to distribute several copies with messengers when the time comes to announce this decision," Kelsea folded her hands neatly in front of her. She looked up suddenly as the door opened and the masked form of the Fetch entered. 

"This meeting is adjourned, everyone is dismissed," Kelsea watched as everyone got up and shuffled out of the room as the Fetch approached. All except for Elston who had replaced Pen as her close guard. Kelsea remained sitting as she waited for the Fetch to speak. He lowered his mask. His face was solemn as it so often was these days. 

"I've done what I can, but the rest will be in the doctor's hands," The Fetch explained as he sat down in the seat next to Kelsea. There was a time that would have made her heart flutter, back when she could barely keep her mind off him on their way to the Keep. But that chemistry was gone now, perhaps it was because she had seen who Gavin really was, through Katie's eyes. Or perhaps everything that she had been through had taken that naive lovestruck part of her away. 

"Let us hope that will be enough," Kelsea said honestly, she reached up and adjusted Row's crown. Or was it hers now? Many had worn it but they had not experienced its power the way Kelsea had. "But I know that isn't the only thing you came to speak with me about,"

The Fetch nodded at Kelsea, ignoring Elston. 

“No, it isn’t, I have a request for you,” The Fetch swallowed as he looked at the young woman he’d seen so many times before as she grew up in seclusion. Back in that cabin tucked away in the woods. She was more a queen now than she had ever been- or perhaps she just looked that way, sitting tall with her hands folded and her plain face stern. She was more resolute and determined than ever.

“Me and my men have seen everything since the dawn of this Tearling, but we don’t wish to see anymore. We have lived many lives and we don’t desire to go on like this,” The Fetch explained but the queen next to him seemed unmoved. It was surprising considering that Kelsea had proven herself to be one of the most empathetic rulers the Tearling had ever known. 

“You want me to lift your curse?” Kelsea raised an eyebrow. She had committed great acts of magic before, she wondered if she would even be able to, or if her Sapphires had gone dormant. The way they had always been whilst they hung around her mother’s neck, or the way they refused to submit to the Red Queen. Perhaps they had decided their work was done. 

“No, we want you to kill us,” The Fetch’s voice was firm and unwavering. The room with only the three of them suddenly felt even more silent than before. Kelsea felt Elston shift slightly behind her. 

“You’ve made quite the name for yourself as The Fetch, and yet you ask me to murder you and your company. You have no interest in helping to rebuild this kingdom now that Row is gone? Now that the Red Queen is gone?” Kelsea asked, looking over the man in front of her. By the show they put on in their camps no one would have ever guessed that they desired death. 

“You were able to lift Row’s curse and-“

“Something I should have been warned against. I should have been given a clear reason to distrust him instead of having to take the word of a man who’d broken into my bedroom to mock me, I freed Row to try and save my people, and I paid for my foolishness in the lives of others,” Kelsea herself was even surprised by how harsh her words sounded out loud. But thinking about all of this was upsetting, her mistakes as a ruler cost the lives of others. They still didn’t know how many had been killed by Row’s children, and they might never have an accurate count, but the numbers in the capital were already in the dozens. The room once again fell silent but this time for longer. The Fetch looked like he wanted to crawl out of his skin. 

“Have I not repaid for my past sins? Have I not done enough? Destabilizing the Mort, coming to your aid? Have I not seen enough death already?” Row had mocked the idea that Kelsea would be able to kill him, and yet she had been able to kill Row, she was more powerful than the Red Queen, and more surprisingly she was powerful enough to destroy Row and free him from his curse. 

Kelsea was quiet, thinking of everything Gavin must have experienced. It would have been hundreds of years since they had seen the ones they loved. Hundreds of years since seeing their families and committing their crimes against the Tearling. But to Kelsea if felt so fresh, she had only just experienced these things recently, sitting in her cell of the Mort. She could still see Johnathan Tear, so young and yet withered and dying as Rowland Finn had left him to rot. Katie, locked up and pregnant making decisions to try and save her life and that of the baby budding within her, Kelsea’s own ancestors. If Gavin hadn’t at least tried to set Katie free Kelsea wouldn’t be sitting here. 

“I will see if I can lift your curse, but I will not end your lives, I killed Rowland Finn out of pure necessity, he could not be rehabilitated, even after hundreds of years, he would continue to cause harm and death,” Kelsea watched as immediate relief flooded across Gavin’s face. 

“But I cannot do that today, I have still been recovering since defeating Row,” She said more softly, as if the walls had ears. “I slept for two days after his death, and each day since I feel stronger but this magic does not come without a price, if I am not careful it will kill me entirely.” She sighed softly, once again she felt Elston take a step closer to her, she noticed him more than she had Pen. 

“Killing Row’s children and Row might have killed me if he had struggled more, I know William Tear’s own death was being drained from the strain of trying to open the doorway again,” Kelsea once again adjusted the crown atop her head. “And I do not plan to die yet, I have too much to do,” 

Then the Fetch did something that surprised Kelsea, he reached over and took hold of her hands in his own much larger ones. The action caught the queen off guard, she felt her green eyes widen as she tried to will the expression off of her face. 

“My men and I had high hopes for you and even higher expectations, but know that since the dawn of this Tearling we have never seen such a ruler who would give so much for her people,” He looked sincere, his eyes locked on hers and speaking sternly. Kelsea didn't like it, it felt like a permanent goodbye or something like that, she was too used to the Fetch teasing her and criticizing her- or Gavin as she saw through Katie's memories, manipulated and eager for approval. The man before her was acting like neither. 

The Fetch paused, the expression on the young queen's face was not what he had expected. She looked confused or perhaps she was upset with him about everything, or the fact that his request had been for death.   
By the look on her face, she thought he would end his life as soon as the curse was lifted. He drew his hands back from hers. 

"I owe you a sincere apology," He swallowed, watching those green eyes widen. At least those had always remained the same even when she had transformed into Lily. 

"Your apology doesn't belong to me, I hold no grudge against you, Gavin. What you choose to do is your choice alone," The queen stood up, glancing at her close guard. It wasn't the same guard that had been her close guard in the past, Pen Alcott, who he'd knocked out in his cot. 

"If we have nothing else to discuss then I must be going, even while I am recovering I do not have extra time in this rebuilding time," The queen explained as she pushed back a lock of her dark hair. She waited for a moment but the Fetch only shook his head, staying seated as the queen and her guard made their exit. 

Once the queen lifted the curse it would be his choice. Gavin's choice. Three hundred years ago it had been Row who had manipulated and controlled them, then as they were bound by Katie's curse it had been their regret that imprisoned them. But now nothing would be binding them, to each other or to the Tearling. All these years he had wanted to die, and finally, he would have the choice as the Tearling was being rebuilt. 

He stood up from the table, looking down at the mask he had always worn as "The Fetch". He grabbed it in two broad hands. The Fetch had a good run, he'd done a lot as the Fetch, but perhaps now it was time for Gavin to live out the rest of his mortal life. 

With a loud crack, the mask splintered down the center as Gavin folded it in half. Next time he was out he’d drop it off in one of the many burn piles the attempted to clear the city of the many hordes of corpses Row had sent upon them. He didn’t need his mask anymore. He didn’t need “The Fetch” anymore. 

Gavin held the broken halves of the mask as he headed off to the quarters he and his men had settled into while staying at the Keep. No doubt the others were waiting for his return. He pushed the door open as he entered. They were not staying in the Queen’s ward, though if they wanted to gain entry there would be little anyone could do to stop them. That was until the curse was lifted. 

Alain who was sitting as he polished an already perfectly polished dagger was the first to look up. His deep voice called out to Gavin as he set down his dagger. 

"What news from the girl?" Alain asked the question that was on everyone's mind. 

"She says she will lift the curse," Gavin watched the reactions of the men in the room. Surprise, relief and some sat stoic, digesting the news. 

"For all of us?" Lear broke the momentary quiet that had fallen over the group. 

"Yes, I imagine for all who desire to have their curse lifted. Kelsea has proven to us that her word is good," Gavin set down the broken halves of his terrible mask. He felt a shift in the room. It was a big choice to make and this time they had no one to blame but themselves if they would come to regret it later. It was a painful reminder of just how easily they had been manipulated and used before. How foolish they had been. 

"And what happens when the curse is lifted? Will we die? Will all of our years meet us at once?"

Gavin paused, he didn't know. The queen probably didn't know. When Rowland had died he had hit the floor looking the same as he had all those years ago. As the flames had died and the smoke cleared Gavin had seen the handsome young man limp on the cold stone.

His dark hair had framed his sallow skin. He looked as handsome as he always had in life- but the fire in his eyes was gone, the charisma that made him so dangerous had vanished. His sharp dark eyes only stared blankly, glassy reflections without feeling. Gavin hadn't believed it, he'd even held one of his pale wrists between his fingers- feeling for a pulse that never came. Is that what would happen to them if their curse was lifted? 

"I'm not sure, but I intend to find out all the same," Gavin replied honestly as he looked out at the faces of the companions he'd spent so long with. This might end up being where they parted ways. Though everything that had happened after Johnathan Tear's murder they had always been together. Their bond had made the good times better and the hard times more bearable. 

“None of you have to join me-“ Gavin was about to explain but he was cut off by Alain’s voice. 

“We know, you don’t have to tell us, we’ll all decide for ourselves, when did she say she would lift your curse?” Alain asked, getting right to business. 

“She didn’t say exactly, though the queen confided in me, she is still recovering from her feat at the gate, though we’d best keep that amongst ourselves,” Gavin took a seat, kicking out his legs in front of him. “It took a lot from her to kill all of Row’s children, and Row himself,” Gavin sighed for a moment, she had proven herself to be incredibly powerful but it was as she said, magic wasn’t free, it came with a cost. A cost from her health which she could not spare in this time while her kingdom needed her. Once again this young woman was taking in a great undertaking, the likes men would shake in their boots at the mere thought of. She had taken the throne with a knife in her shoulder, she’d stopped an invasion, survived the prisons of the mort and had slain the red queen but her work was far from over. She had to be careful, not to sacrifice all of her strength and wither away. She wouldn’t be blamed if she wanted to rest, at last, take a backseat as the queen but she was just as determined. Gavin swallowed all of this work she was doing to put the Tearling back together. 

"I will wait a month for her to recover her strength and then I will return to this keep," Gavin was formulating another plan. "I reckon I should use my time like this well, better than I have all these years," Gavin looked at his own palm for a moment before closing his fingers. 

"And where then will you go?" Lear asked, leaning forward in his chair. 

"I will return to the Mort, under my false name we have managed to stir up distrust in the Red Queen. Now there is a void in power, I will see what chaos has befallen the Mort, and I believe that the Glynn Queen has the right idea," He paused, he could tell he'd caught the attention of the group. 

"The people of the Tearling are not the only ones who deserve reform, we are all the descendants of the town and the crossing, none of them would have wanted this. Not William or Johnathan or...Katie or Victoria," He swallowed as those painful memories were brought to the surface. Murdering a member of their own guard and betraying Katie and Johnathan. To other people, Johnathan Tear was a historical name, but to them, it was the name of a young man whose life they had helped cut short, they had murdered Victoria and imprisoned Johnathan until his death. What would they think if they could see them now? 

"We started a revolution in the Mort, I don't see why I should abandon now that the Red Queen has died, these are dangerous time and I should use this curse to bring about some good there, positive change, if I can," Gavin was perhaps speaking more to himself than his company at this point. He could work on restructuring or at least improving the Mort, he had lived many lives before. But perhaps he should make his one life as mortal worth the most. The way Kelsea Glynn was even after all her hardship. 

Gavin would have never guessed that watching the girl in the woods growing up and learning from a distance, that once day she would be a young woman he would look to for inspiration. 

“You’ve always been a fool,” Alain sighed, shaking his head a bit. “But you’re a fool I’ve always followed, I reckon if we choose one mortal life we should make it one to amend for our part in destroying that town,” Alain rubbed the back of his neck and sighed, leaning back against the stone wall. 

“Well then,” Lear cleared his voice, “Then should we ride out at dawn? I imagine no better way to redeem ourselves if the Glynn Queen really intends on letting us free,” Lear shrugged his shoulders, his dark countenance broke into a slight smile. 

"Then we will ride at dawn, and whoever joins us is welcome, we will return in a fortnight," Gavin had started his day feeling ill with regret. But tonight he'd prepare for a journey, working towards getting that curse removed and feeling like he was working towards being worthy of getting his curse removed.


	6. Breakfast with the Queen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kelsea has an unexpected guest arrive to share a meal with her, but it's much more important than her usual meals.

Kelsea watched from her cool bedroom window as The Fetch’s party rode out from the keep as dawn broke quietly over the horizon. None of them wore their usual masks, and their black cloaks billowed over the backs of their horses as they rode off. Kelsea was sure that The Fetch and his company without their masks on would have the Keep riled up. Even in dire times, people would look for distractions or simply something to talk about. She couldn’t help but wonder if any of the other women in the castle would be as smitten by Gavin as she once was. The thought gave her a slight smile, she must remind herself not to be entirely consumed by the problems her kingdom faced- she must remember Andalie’s advice. Not every thought needed to be a grim one - lest she fall back into ugly old habits. Seeing them vanish she stepped away from her window, releasing her long dark hair from its sleeping braid as she did so. 

Kelsea sat down in front of her mirror as she brushed out the waves of her hair. She was still getting used to seeing her own reflection again. She had sort of gotten used to seeing Lily’s face looking back at her- even if she hadn’t noticed until her own face was back. She was no beauty like Lily or Marguerite, she wondered what her mother would say to her if she saw her now. Would she finally recognize her for her achievements and efforts? Or would she not recognize her at all without Lily’s face? Kelsea pursed her lips, why should it matter anyway?

Kelsea was in the middle of trying to rub the sleep out of her eyes when a knock at her door disrupted her. She sighed and grabbed her robe that had been hanging up next to her bed. Elston’s heavy footsteps could be heard moving to the door as Kelsea wrapped her robe around herself and tied the sash at the waist. She hadn’t even gotten dressed or eaten breakfast yet and someone was already knocking at her door. 

“It’s Pen, should I allow him in, majesty?” Elston’s voice took Kelsea off guard. She had expected it to be Lazarus or Andalie. Not Pen, they hardly spoke since everything had happened- stealing strange silent glances at each other while they ate or at meetings where all her guard were present. Hearing that it was Pen put her heart in her stomach. 

“Let him in,” Kelsea pushed her hair back, her relatively relaxed mood was gone and she was tense- even if she shouldn’t be. She was supposed to regard Pen as just another guard. She walked over slipping on her chamber slippers. Clearly, it wasn’t just a casual “hello” or he wouldn’t have shown up alone to talk to her privately. 

There he stood in the doorway- his face was still sterner than it was when they were alone together, probably because Elston was still standing there. His presence was hard to forget. 

“I was wonder if we could speak over breakfast?” Pen must have had the shift off because he stood in the doorway holding a tray with a meal for two and a steaming teapot. Kelsea let her shoulders drop a bit and she stepped aside to let Pen in. She caught a strange look from Elston but she tried to ignore it. It would get back to Lazarus, everything did. But it wasn’t anyone’s business but her own. If Pen was willing to deal with Lazarus then it should be none of Kelsea’s concern. 

“Elston, can I ask for some privacy?” Kelsea asked already knowing her new close guard was about to protest.

“Majesty, I must insist-“ Elston paused when he saw the lack of patience on the queen’s face. 

“Fine, but I’ll be just outside the door, your Majesty,” Elston said but clearly he wasn’t too pleased about making an exception. No one wanted to be chewed out by Lazarus.

“Thank you, Elston,” Kelsea sighed as she watched her close guard leave the room and Pen set the tray down on the table where they had shared meals together in the past. 

“You are alright with this, right Majesty?” Pen asked, he seemed hesitant about sitting down.

“Alright with “what” exactly?” Kelsea asked as she sat down, crossing her legs and taking the initiative to pour herself a cup of steaming tea. 

“With talking about everything,” Pen took his seat and waited for his turn to pour a cup of tea. 

“You know well enough that I wouldn’t have let you in, had that not been the case,” Kelsea spoke while cooling her tea with a breath and taking a sip. There was a pause in the air as she waited for Pen to dress the issue, seeing as she had ignited the whole thing. Kelsea watched as Pen nodded. 

“I figured I should get it all out in the air, I admit, I’m not sure any of us expected to survive all of this,” Pen glanced between Kelsea before attending to his breakfast. Kelsea blinked- it had seemed rather dire at the gate. Her guards must have been preparing to defend her to the death. 

“When I first put on Row’s crown I saw a lot of different things,” Kelsea sighed again, admitting this outlaid for the first time was strange. 

“Like you had one of your visions?” Pen asked slowly. He’d stayed by her many times while she had visions of the past- her green eyes would go hazy and distant and she moved as if she were in a trance. 

“Not exactly, I saw many things, all at once,” Kelsea furrowed her brows, trying to describe something she herself could hardly understand. She took a bite of her breakfast before continuing. 

“I saw the past and the future, and so many possibilities- I saw Lazarus overtaken by Row’s children, I saw them overtake you as you tried to protect my body,” Kelsea buttered up a piece of toast. She had felt her heart stop in her chest as she had seen everything- it had been wretched. But here he was now, sitting across from her, leaning forward a bit intently, his brown eyes attentive. “So you were right to think that, we all would have died,” Kelsea took a bite of her toast. 

Pen was quiet- he never said something meaningless to fill the silence, but his face was concerned. Anyone would be, Kelsea supposed, if they were just told you had seen their death. He leaned back after a few moments looking out the window as he took a deep sip of his tea. 

"But you saved us all, you alone destroyed all of those creatures and freed the Tearling," Pen's voice was quiet and sincere as he looked at Kelsea as he spoke. 

"We always knew you would be a good queen," Pen's voice was reassuring but even so Kelsea knew the deaths of so many had happened under her rule. She was no great leader, she was just a young woman trying to do her best for her kingdom. She was trying to do her best to repair the many mistakes made by those who came before her. Especially her mother. But she didn't want to think of that now. It could take a break, at least until she was done eating. 

"Is that all I am to you now, Pen?" Kelsea decided to ask the hard question. The one that hung in the air over the two of them, more tangible than any sheets that had hung over them in the past. Kelsea watched Pen shift uncomfortably in his seat, his lips pressing into a flat line for a moment before he chose the right words. 

"I think you'll always be more than just a "Queen" to me, majesty," Pen swallowed, "I told you before we left for the Keep, when I resigned my post, I always loved you." He looked at Kelsea his cheeks tinged with just a slight blush as he spoke. 

"Saying that in the same breath as saying we're through, makes me think perhaps you were just placating me," Kelsea said honestly. As much as she felt tense about speaking about it all, she knew it would be for the best. Getting it all out into the open so that she could move on. Regardless of what Pen was about to say to her. 

"I don't think I'd be able to, even if I wanted to, you are not easily bribed or appeased, majesty," Pen cracked half a sad smile. He scooped a generous amount of oatmeal into his spoon. "But I am a queen's guard, and I want to stay by your side as a guard for years to come," Kelsea knew Pen cared a lot about his career and that was admirable. 

"I understand, it is not my place to interfere with your plans, I imagine you made up your mind while I was in Mortemese?" Kelsea tried to keep a straight face even if his words stung the second time around. Had he realized while she was gone that he preferred it without her? What had it been like while she was gone? Kelsea watched as a pained expression flickered across Pen's face, poorly disguised.

"Not in the way you think, Majesty," Pen glanced out of the window, rubbing the back of his neck for a moment. One of his quiet awkward little smiles graced his handsome face for a moment. Kelsea raised an eyebrow, waiting for him to elaborate. 

"I feared your death waited for you in the Mort, it was a dreadful time as we waited to go into the Mort for you," Pen's voice was downcast, his face was uncomfortable. "I feared we would never meet again, and in the meantime, I realized I was becoming an unfit guard," 

Kelsea pursed her lips, she hadn't known what awaited her in the Mort either, but she had no choice. She was quiet for a few long moments as she listened to him. She took a sip of her tea, glancing out of the window for a moment. She could only assume that meant that he had missed her. What a strange way to show it. Were most men this mysterious?

"It's alright, Pen, you don't need to justify your choices. Not with me," Kelsea said softly though she felt her chest ache as she said it. She wanted closure and even if she wouldn't admit it, she missed Pen. They used to talk, joke and laugh alone together. And other times he was her silent shadow, watching over her as her loyal close guard. Elston's presence, while she worked, was not so easy to disregard. She had developed more feelings than she had ever expected to, but she needed to put that aside. It was Pen's career. 

"If you came to try and apologize there is no need to, we both knew what we were getting into," Kelsea didn't look at him as she spoke, instead her gaze settled on her breakfast. She knew damn well it was a lie- she hadn't expected to feel this way. She hadn't expected those little possessive moments that hit her like little pangs when he'd leave for two days. But she was young, she was still learning about all of this. Pen was older- more experienced- he probably knew better. 

Maybe Pen had caught a sad look in her eyes- or maybe something else because suddenly there was a hand on hers- caught mid-reach for her spoon. She looked up suddenly at the man sitting across from her. 

"That's not it," Pen's voice was louder than before. A bit of urgency flashed across his face before vanishing. 

Kelsea gently slipped her hand out from under his- watching him closely. He'd made his position very clear, twice now. 

"Then what is it, exactly?" She tried to will her heartbeat to slow back down to a normal rate. 

"The truth is, I've missed you, your Majesty," Pen swallowed, again his voice was quiet- meant only for the two of them. 

"Well, I've missed you as well, Pen, but do not think that you are barred from speaking with me- all my guards do- we share our meals together of course," Kelsea frowned, seeing that her words had brought no smile to his face. 

"I know that, Majesty," Pen paused for a moment. 

"Don't tell me, you regret calling off our affair?" Kelsea didn't notice that she had begun to lean forward into their conversation. Her dark brows were knit together. 

That awkward little smile that Pen so often wore while they were alone together was back. Oh. 

"Then I will not tell you that, Majesty," 

Kelsea leaned back, the aching hurt in her heart had flared to a burning flame. She set down her spoon rather quickly and stood. Her chair wobbled and almost fell but it didn't. Pen looked startled, hurrying to follow suit - getting out of his chair. He looked worried, he must think she was about to send him out. He wasn't wearing his armor, so his shift mustn't be for a while. 

"Do not insinuate those sorts of things so lightly, Pen,” Kelsea scolded. She was disappointed by her own reaction, she should be more regal than this. 

“I do not say it lightly, I know what it could mean for me, Majesty,” Pen swallowed, the two of them stood apart by a few feet, looking at each other. Kelsea frowned trying to sort through the many questions running through her head.

“And then what of her? What of the other woman you go off to see then? I’m sure she wouldn’t appreciate it,” Kelsea swallowed, she knew that things hadn’t worked out the way she planned. It’s not like she was just going back into a messy relationship that had occurred in the panic of an oncoming invasion. 

Pen looked to the side, rubbing the back of his neck as he glanced out the window, his eyes avoiding hers. Last time they had spoken about the mystery woman he’d attempted to slam the curtain closed between them. 

“There really isn’t another woman,” He finally mumbled out, that tinge of a blush was back on his face. 

“Pen, I wasn’t born yesterday,” Kelsea felt herself cross her arms over her robe, drawing her form up a bit to look at Pen. 

“No, I mean, she isn’t a lover,” Pen swallowed, that nervous smile had made its way back. Kelsea paused she drew in a long breath. 

“So you had a similar arrangement with her as you did with me?” Kelsea raised an eyebrow, perhaps she was being a bit unfair, for she had pursued him. But she wasn’t sure what to think of this all. 

“Well, in truth Majesty, I would have gladly called things off with her, had you only asked, though our arrangement was never meant to see the sun,” Pen cleared his throat and looked back at Kelsea. 

“I see,” Kelsea was quiet for a moment, she sat down on the edge of her window sill. She crossed her legs under her nightgown. “And this time you would proposition something different?” She felt her heart pounding in her chest. 

“Only if you were willing to be propositioned to,” Pen himself looked hesitant. 

“You know my looks will not return to how they were,” Kelsea gestured at herself for a moment. “I am not beautiful the way I was, if you expect me to become pretty again you’ll be disappointed,” Kelsea sighed and pursed her lips.

“Lady,” Pen took a step closer to her. He reached out and took Kelsea’s hand, but this time she let her hand be taken without pulling away. 

“You were always more than pretty, at least to me,” Pen said quietly. He covered her hand with his larger ones. Kelsea felt herself swallow and nodded. 

“It wouldn’t be a private ordeal, the castle already knows about us,” She said quietly, she could picture Lazarus’s disdain. “I know you want to become the captain of the guard one day, of the queen’s guard,” Kelsea actually managed to find a bit of courage and squeeze his hand back. 

“But if my plans come into fruition, if I live long enough to see them done, there will be no need for a queen’s guard,” She spoke even more softly now. Already her moves to create the council were being questioned. She needed to ease her plans along or they would fail. But she could confide in Pen, and perhaps, for now, he might be the only one. He looked at her, listening quietly the way he did so well. 

“I hope that by the end of my reign there will not be a monarchy, but a parliament, a democracy, that my children will not be heirs to the throne, but normal children,” She felt her shoulders slump a bit. But Pen’s face wasn’t critical or mad. 

He shook his head after a moment, a smile on his face, “You always were a crusader weren’t you? Though I reckon that bit of information is to stay between us?” He looked down at the young woman in front of him. She’d always strived for what was right, even now. The guards had all been involved with the queen before him, but here was a queen worth defending, until the very death. And a woman worth even more. 

"I suppose you'll have your work cut out for you with Lazarus," Kelsea cracked half a smile, "But even if you removed you as a guard, that doesn't mean," She felt a bit embarrassed saying it out loud, but, "That doesn't mean you'd have to be a stranger."

There plenty of other positions in the castle she could offer him and besides she could keep who she wanted as her lover. The Mace wasn't her father, not that any of her older guards could talk, they all had been involved with her mother. 

"We'll see if it comes to that, Kelsea," Pen smiled, that handsome face of his seemed so much more charming when he was smiling. 

"Ah, back on a first-name basis?" Kelsea teased him a bit, feeling her own face flush a bit. Strange, how that could feel more intimate than sex in the right situation. 

Kelsea blinked as she suddenly felt Pen capture her lips, the guard bent over to kiss her. She felt her back bump against the window, the chill met her back even through her robe. Or perhaps the chill was induced by the moment they were sharing. Her cheeks were now thoroughly blushing as Pen pulled away from her. He looked like he might come swooping back in but Kelsea tightened her robe and shook her head a bit, and an embarrassed smile on her face. 

"I have meetings and hearings all this morning, so you'd best be off before Elston kills us both, I must be getting ready for my day," Kelsea watched as Pen nodded, wiping his moistened lips for a moment. Kelsea got up and led Pen over to the door, playfully shooing him out, it felt nice to be able to relax around someone again. They both set their faces before opening the door, knowing they were going to meet with a grumpy Elston. But the man didn't say anything as he returned to his alcove so Kelsea could get dressed in privacy. After all, Kelsea figured his new position as her close guard would probably have him missing his lover as well, though the exact nature of his relationship with Kibb was still a mystery to her. 

She pulled on her dress for the day, fixing the sapphires that lay over her chest and affixing the crown atop her head as looked in the mirror. It would be a long day, especially listening to the grievances of nobles who suffered the least but squeaked the loudest during these hard times. But she would do her best to get through it all in a more diplomatic manner than usual. After all, she was suddenly in a better mood, despite the passing glance Elston had shot her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the fandom is divided on Pen and the ship, but I hope the chapter wasn't overwhelming and I hope that it seemed in character since that was my biggest goal. I wanted the characters to act like themselves even if I personally wanted to rush things along. I wanted to write this chapter earlier but I felt it needed to be at the right place for the story because there were so many other pressing matters to attend to in this fic. Kelsea is working on repairing her kingdom but also her personal relationships, with Gavin, Pen and her guards and everyone in her life. Her duty as a queen has often led her to neglect her own needs and as this fix-it ending goes on I want to give her the space to tend to her own needs and find the closure she didn't get in the canon ending. I want my readers to know where she plans to take her kingdom but also her personal life. And I really hope everything still seems in character for the rest of the fandom! 
> 
> Thank you for reading another chapter! It means the world to me!


	7. The Graveyard in the Keep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kelsea works on attending to her duties as the Queen but an unexpected mention of someone changes the course of her day, and perhaps her actions moving forward.

As Kelsea had suspected the meetings were long and tedious. It was a great amount of sitting and listening to the grievances of the nobility and their many complaints. Kelsea did her best to be patient and considerate even though she knew well enough that they were suffering the least. There were many times she felt like a glorified babysitter or a councilor, working on placating spoiled children. She would still not spoil them the way previous rulers had, but without the immediate threat of the destruction of her kingdom, she would need their cooperation. Perhaps now more than ever. Even though it felt like she was swallowing her pride to do so. But perhaps she should swallow her pride. 

Through the meetings, she must have gone through a good many cups of tea. But it was one of the few things helping her keep her patience. And for that she was grateful. Because they would try to stop her at every turn and they weren’t exactly shy about voicing their many, many criticisms of her young reign. If it had been more profitable for them, they may have even preferred a long war with the Mort. Kelsea rubbed her temples as the meeting drew to a close and she gathered up her notes. Of course, the castle scribes would be taking down the minutes of everything that had occurred but Kelsea still felt best jotting down her own notes as well. One could never be too careful. 

Kelsea watched as the crowd shuffled out- catching a few ugly looks thrown her way. But she had no energy to make any rude remarks in return to the many looks and remarks she had received. Perhaps the bitter anger she had felt before had ebbed into a steady burning passion. She wouldn’t feel any peace until she did what she needed. And fighting with the nobility would only slow her down, so she’d have to save her clever comments for her diary- or the company of her guards.

She listened as the heavy door closed behind her “guests” and let out a deep sigh. She turned and looked over her shoulder to see The Mace, looking slightly amused. Kelsea frowned and raised an eyebrow. 

“Something caught your interest, Lazarus?” Kelsea couldn’t help but ask. 

“You must have been a very stubborn child, Majesty,” Lazarus’s scarred face was bent into an ever so slight smile. Lazarus’s smiles were hard to come by as was his approval.

“And it’s a good thing too, during these meetings I feel like I may as well be pulling teeth,” Kelsea rubbed her forehead for a moment as one of the scribes handed her own of the copies of the minutes. She nodded as a thanks and shuffled them under her own notes. 

“Pulling teeth however is not so rewarding, Dyer should know,” The Mace scoffed and Dyer who had been standing against the wall rolled his eyes. 

“Fuck off, Mace,” Dyer huffed under his breath. 

“Well, I’m glad you seem to think it’s a worthwhile endeavor, the changes we’re making,” Kelsea swallowed the last bit of tea she had. That should be enough for today.

“Mhurn would have thought so too,”

The room went terribly silent and Kelsea felt her heart catch in her throat. It hadn’t been the Mace who had spoke but Kelsea was too startled to care who it was. Her mouth had suddenly gone dry and she found herself reshuffling her papers. Her own father- her own father who had been manipulated by weakness and addiction had been the one to stick the knife in her shoulder. She touched the wound’s scar as she stood up.

“Mhurn was a traitor to this kingdom, its people and myself,” Kelsea spoke the words but she knew they sounded hollow. Kelsea only just barely meant them. She remembered how the guards hand been ready to hang him out to dry. Some of them would have been happy to let the crows pick him apart for his betrayal. 

“Majesty, are you-“

“I’m fine, I don’t wish to speak on this matter any further,” Kelsea stood and gathered her papers in her arms. She felt herself trembling and she could only hope it wasn’t noticeable to the others. She could practically feel Pen’s concerned gaze.

“I will see you all at dinner,” And with that Kelsea decided to go, Elston’s heavy footsteps followed behind her. 

She walked more swiftly than usual as she passed the keep guards and the other staff of the Keep. If only she could so easily walk away from the feelings that surrounded Mhurn’s death. Or perhaps- Mhurn’s murder. He had committed treason, he had conspired to attempted murder, attempted to murder her, himself and probably a few other things as well. But he had received no trial and no sentencing. But a court may have still decided to end his life- the people’s thirst for the blood of a traitor was a fearsome thing. All the more reason they needed a court system in their country. 

Kelsea caught a glimpse of Marguerite as she turned the corner in the hall with some of the keep children trailing behind her. 

“Ah, Marguerite! Do you have a moment?” Kelsea moved to catch up with the beautiful red-haired woman. Kelsea noticed the children looking up at her with big eyes, curious and shy. The Queen. 

“Always, Majesty,” The woman dipped her head in a slight polite little bow. She was a good woman, Kelsea could only imagine what it must have been like all those years with her uncle and even before that. 

“Do you know how Aisa is doing? I have not spoken to Andalie recently, I wanted to give her time to be with her daughter,” Kelsea explained as she tucked her papers under her arm. Hopefully, she was alright, Kelsea could do with some good news. 

“I read to her this morning, though she is probably resting now, Majesty,” Marguerite tucked back a lock of beautiful flaming hair behind her ear. Out of the corner of her eye, Kelsea caught a keep guard staring. He quickly looked away. At least now Marguerite was her own woman- she didn’t have to be paraded around with a rope around her neck practically naked. She was a teacher now- not a prize. 

“I am glad to hear that- I admire I was afraid to ask,” Kelsea felt her shoulders relax, she was more relieved than she realized. 

“Once she starts giving me trouble again we’ll know she’s really feeling better,” Marguerite smiled knowingly. Out of all the children in the Keep it was Aisa who gave her the most trouble. She was the most troubled and now she was going through even more. A young child fighting for her life. 

“That’s true, I suppose. I’m glad she’s doing a bit better, I’ll be sure to let her rest, I’m sure she needs it,” Kelsea offered the other woman a smile. “I’ll see you around the Keep,” Kelsea looked down at the children and gave them a little smile, watching one of them give a little wave in return.

“Of course, Majesty,” Marguerite gave another little bow as she continued to shepherd along her little crowd of children. Kelsea just nodded again as she watched her leave before heading back to her chambers. 

Kelsea set down her meeting notes on her work table- a considerably larger one than the table that had occupied her chambers while her mother was queen. While she often worked in the library or at a meeting, sometimes she just needed to sit and think by herself. She slid the papers across the desk, the parchment sliding quietly against the wood. 

She let her arms cradle her head as she tucked her forehead into her elbows. 

“Majesty?” Elston’s voice broke through the quiet. 

“My fathers dead by my own hand and my mother had a woman die for her so that she could abandon her entire kingdom,” Kelsea groaned quietly. The mention of Mhurn had thrown her off. Both her parents had been traitors, in different ways. If such a thing as luck existed surely she didn’t have any. A queen with two treacherous parents, what irony. Moments like this Kelsea would have done about anything to have Barty and Carlin with her. Hell, she’d enjoy Carlin scolding her and criticizing her choices. At least Carlin cared about her, and her Kingdom. Kelsea could only guess what had caused Carlin’s loyalty to her mother, despite very clearly not agreeing with her. 

“All of that was beyond your control, Majesty,” Elston had his hands folded behind his back, Kelsea eyes him from the desk. 

“If I had known Mhurn was my biological father I would not have executed him myself. I should have been warned,” Kelsea couldn’t keep the bitterness out of her voice. 

“The Mace is loyal to the previous queen, he would not break his vows. This goes to you as well, Majesty - if you were to have us make vows of a smilier nature,” Elston defended firmly. The guards’ loyalty to their vows was unwavering. But instead of feeling relieved, she felt frustrated. 

“A mistake you all would do better not to repeat, no vows are as scared as the lives we could have saved I had been properly prepared,” If those nineteen years she’d been tucked away in the cottage Carlin could have been making a plan for her, or at least preparing to deal with human trafficking happening on a massive legal scale. 

“And a mistake I would do well not to copy, if my child was to become a monarch,” Kelsea looked away from Elston and stared at the stone wall in front of her instead. 

"If?" Elston raised a heavy brow but Kelsea decided to pointedly ignore the question. She was quiet, lost in thought and Elston began to shuffle over to his alcove before she interrupted him.

“My mother - there was a body of a woman that was staged as my mother,” Kelsea looked up to see Elston nodding- his worn face was clearly wary of where Kelsea was going with this line of thought.

“Yes,” Elston’s voice was gruff, was he expecting her to scold them for murdering an innocent woman? She certainly should- but that was probably done by Carrol and The Mace. 

“So she must be the body they buried in place of my mother then?” Kelsea had often imagined her mother’s funeral when she was young. Flowers upon flowers and weeping men and women, burying a beautiful and kind queen surrounded by flower petals. What she imagined now was very different. An innocent woman dressed in her mother’s clothing- pale and cold with death. A solemn guard with their heads bowed in silence and secrecy as they buried her mother’s crimes along with her doppelgänger. A public mourning, not for a kind and well doing queen, but for the state of their kingdom. It must have been a dark day indeed for the Tearling. 

“Is she buried along with my other relatives?” Kelsea stood up straight and looked at Elston. 

Kelsea stood up, walking to her closet and grabbing a heavy cloak and pulling it around her form, tucking her long dark hair beneath it. “Take me to the tombs, Elston,”

“Majesty, I must insist,” Elston paused. The man let out a heavy sigh. He owed this queen much- but getting used to being her close guard was not easy. She was much more motivated than her mother had been, and not easily deterred. “Fine then, but we shouldn’t go alone, it is after all, beyond the Queen’s Ward,”

“Then the others can come along,” Kelsea seemed unconcerned as she led the way to the door. The two of them stepped out into the hallway and Elston’s deep voice barked out at the others.

“Pen! Kibb! Let’s move!” At Elston’s words, the two men quickly arrived beside them as swiftly and sharply as soldiers stepping into formation. Kelsea gave them each a nod as they walked- the familiar sound of her guards’ armor was and boots walking behind her was something she hadn’t realized she missed in her Mort cell. 

“And what is this about?” Lazarus stepped beside her, matching her pace as she walked. 

“I’m making a visit to the Keep’s graves, Lazarus,” Kelsea waited to hear him say something but he was silent for a few moments. He must know how she was bothered by the mention of her father. She was surprised to see him just nod along. 

“As you wish, Majesty,” The Mace stepped ahead to lead the way. Most of the Keep outside of the Queen’s Ward was unknown to her but hopefully, that would continue to change. She wasn’t sure but she may have a more fearsome reputation now. 

The Mace led them through the Keep, Kelsea felt her guards tighten up around her as they exited the ward. There was a strange cold silence as they moved through the Keep until they made it out to the courtyard that served as the Keep graveyard. A cool breeze met Kelsea as they stepped out and she tightened her cloak around her. A bird called out in the distance- serving as Kelsea’s only welcome to the place her ancestors were buried. Where she would be buried someday- at least if she were to die in the Tearling.

She looked around for a moment- taking her time to take in her surroundings. Her guards were on high-alert for her. After a moment she let out a sigh, beginning to walk past the large stone tombs that jutted out from the earth beneath them.

Here were the bodies of grandfathers and grandmothers past- great aunts and uncles she had never known- save for a name or a portrait in the Keep’s gallery. She let her fingers trace over a pale stone tomb as she walked- it was smooth and cool to the touch. She looked up at Lazarus.

“Lead me to my mother’s tomb, Lazarus,” The man frowned at her but silently led on. He stopped at another large tomb, raised above the ground. Her mother’s name beautifully carved into it along with her birth date and the date of her supposed death. Kelsea stared at it for a moment- her eyes cast downward before sitting down on part of the stone ledge that supported the tomb. There was a body in there- and to them, that’s all the woman had been- a body that looked like her mother.

“If my mother wanted to escape so badly she should have taken her own life and took her place in this tomb,” Kelsea’s voice was just a whisper. After all, this was not just an ordinary secret.

“Majesty,” Lazarus’s voice was sharp and for a moment it reminded Kelsea of the way Carlin would have scolded her- firmly saying “Kelsea!” And tapping her foot against the cottage floor. Kelsea wasn’t sure if she meant it but in this moment she felt it. At least this woman wouldn’t have been murdered for her. 

“What Lazarus? Don’t tell me you’re going to scold me for being upset with her again- you can’t even say she’s dead this time,” Despite only whispering Kelsea’s tongue was still sharp. She didn’t look at him as she spoke. She didn’t want to.

“Then how do you plan to remedy it, majesty?” Lazarus’s voice countered. It reminded Kelsea of the way he’d scolded her in the gallery.

“Don’t belittle me, Lazarus- I must first decide how I feel about this whole thing,” Kelsea lowered the hood of her cloak. She rested her hand atop the tomb. Her underarm went cool from being laid across the stone. “I haven’t exactly had the time to process this- for nineteen- almost twenty years I have believed something entirely different," 

Kelsea looked up to catch an irritated look on Lazaru's face. She was unbothered by it. 

"Her name, do you remember this woman's name who is buried here?" Kelsea asked quietly. In the distance, she heard crows calling. There must be more buzzards around as the cleanup in the capital and the rest of the country continued. A reminder of what her people faced, hopefully, they were taking enough precautions. The last thing they needed was a disease outbreak on their hands. But the crows calling were the only things she heard and Lazarus was staring as if he were made of stone. Of course. 

"Fine then, I'll find out for myself," The frustration in Kelsea's voice was not hidden. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Kibb looking away. They were all silent, Pen looked uncomfortable - not bothering to hide it. Maybe Kelsea hadn't realized that she had some issues to sort out with The Mace. 

"Elston, I'm leaving," Kelsea stood up abruptly, she didn't address her other guards but she heard them getting ready to follow them all the same. 

"Where to, Majesty?" Elston's voice spoke as if she hadn't just scolded the captain of the guard in front of him. 

"To the kitchens, I'd like to wash up before dinner," Kelsea sighed as she walked through the rows of tombs. Maybe good hygiene practices were not widespread throughout the kingdom but Kelsea was lucky enough to be raised by Carlin. Hopefully, a basic understanding of hygiene for good health could become more widespread along with education. 

The Keep seemed surprisingly warm in comparison to the graveyard and the bustling kitchens were even warmer. Kelsea could smell dinner and felt her appetite peak at the smell. She should remind herself to eat a bit less- if she planned on trying to learn swordsmanship again- since she had been told she should carry "less weight". Kelsea frowned for a moment before she felt someone bump her shoulder while she washed her hands. 

She looked to the side, raising an eyebrow only to find that it was Pen- leaning over to wash his hands in the basin. She should have known. 

"I'm sorry, your Majesty," Pen shook his hands off as he finished. Kelsea had a feeling that he would have said more if Elston wasn't with them.

Kelsea nodded and headed out to eat, she sat down and watched as waited as her other guards shuffled in, the table filling up as dinner was being finished in the kitchens. Kelsea looked up and smiled as she watched Father Tyler sit down at his usual seat to join them. At least a few things could stay the same like this, though Kelsea noticed that while she ate Lazarus was unusually quiet. There was something unspoken going on, The Mace wasn't happy. But that could at least wait until tomorrow, or perhaps she'd put it off until the week's end. She had more important issues to attend to, that would be her excuse anyway. 

For now, all she could really think about was the tomb with her mother's name on it. And her mother living out in some cottage- hidden from the world the way Kelsea had once been.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope this chapter was enjoyable, it serves as a stepping stone for the next couple of chapters. But I hope it wasn't too long or boring. Thank you for reading!


	8. Meeting With The Mace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kelsea attempts to address issues with the captain of her guard in light of visiting her mother's tomb.

Kelsea leaned against the wall, her arms folded around herself as she observed quietly. The clanking of swords rang through the room as her guards sparred. She'd never actually sat in during one of these sessions before. The only times she'd seen her guards in action were the times that she was in danger. But now she could relax a bit and just watch without being in fear for her life. She often found her eyes wandering over to Pen more than she would care to admit. For a moment she was reminded of how hard it used to be to keep Gavin off of her mind back when he was just "The Fetch". She was sure Elston had noticed her gaze by the ever so slight shift in his stance. But he said nothing. 

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw The Mace enter. Lazarus looked as stern as ever. Kelsea felt the pit in her stomach return. She sighed, looking up at the ceiling for a moment- glancing at Elston before deciding to head over to The Mace. 

"Lazarus," Kelsea nodded up at the man. 

"Majesty," The Mace dipped his head a bit more stiffly than usual. They had been butting heads more often about her decisions - and the ordeal with her mother was a particularly sore spot. But he was the captain of the guard, a trusted and loyal friend. 

"You have a moment, Lazarus?" Kelsea finally asked before she could change her mind. 

"Of course, Majesty," The Mace crossed his arms. 

"Then the library?" Kelsea moved to leave, she didn't have to look over to know both the guards were following her. 

The library was always a welcome sight- perhaps besides her own chambers, it was where she felt most comfortable. She sank down in one of the armchairs, remembering how her guards had surprised her with the library. She pulled her legs up under her form- no need to sit at the table. It would only make things more tense.

"Elston, you can step outside," Lazarus nodded to the other guard who promptly made his exit. Probably only to stand just outside the door. Kelsea waited for The Mace, who looked like he was going to start their conversation as he settled into another armchair. 

"So I hear Pen's visited you?" Lazarus asked but Kelsea knew t wasn't really a question. He already knew. 

"Do you plan on dismissing him then?" Kelsea asked as casually as she could manage. But if she had learned anything, it was that she was bad at lying. Even Arliss had always been able to see right through her. Lazarus could always see right through her just like the rest of her guards.

"What would you do if I did?" Lazarus asked, another one of his tests. Kelsea set her jaw. 

"He is your guard, you are the captain of my guard- your staffing is none of my business- I have enough to worry about," Kelsea said and stared straight back at The Mace. 

"What would you think of me if I did have him dismissed?" Lazarus pressed. Was he really this concerned about how she would feel? 

Kelsea bit her lower lip and frowned, "Does it matter what I would think?" 

"To me, it does," The Mace didn't miss a beat, and for some reason, it took Kelsea off guard. 

"Well I wouldn't think too highly of you, I know you all had your turns with my mother," Kelsea let out honestly. It was a heavy subject and trying to talk about it always seemed to make things bitter. She watched as a bit of amusement flashed across Lazarus's eyes. Kelsea decided to cut him off before he could speak again. 

"But Pen isn't what I wanted to talk to you about," Kelsea wasn't sure if she wanted to hear about The Mace's decision about Pen and she knew she didn't want to talk about the little affair between herself and her former close guard. 

"I wanted to talk to you more about my mother," Kelsea asserted. How many more secrets could he keep for Elyssa? Kelsea already knew she was alive- she'd been tempted to strangle the woman right then and there. 

"I want to know who is buried in that tomb," Kelsea asked again. At least now it was just the two of them- maybe now The Mace would tell her. Maybe he'd let her in on the secret-

"I cannot tell you that, Majesty," The Mace's voice once again was stern. It wasn't what Kelsea wanted to hear. She took a deep breath- trying to control her temper which was threatening to hit a boiling point soon. 

"Lazarus! My mother's place was taken by an unknown woman who died for her. The least you can do is tell me who she was," Kelsea insisted. She felt her blood getting hot. And seeing Lazarus's unmoved face was all the more frustrating. 

"Do you wish she was the one in that tomb, Majesty?" The Mace had his hands folded as he leaned forward in his seat. 

"That's not what I'm talking about, Lazarus," Kelsea felt her face burn. 

"But is it true?" Lazarus persisted. 

"I don't know, whether or not I want her there- she deserves to be there, doesn't she?" Kelsea huffed and pushed back a lock of her dark hair. "She's lucky I don't haul her back to The Keep and hand her off to the crowd. See what justice they would serve her for what she did," Kelsea threatened. Maybe a bit of the Queen of Spades was coming back through. She watched Lazarus raise a heavy brow over his scarred face. 

"If I was truly a just queen I would have her revealed and tried for her crimes- if not the ones she had committed while they were legal then at least for the woman in the tomb," Kelsea found herself biting the inside of her cheek as she tried to hold herself together. Was this anger and guilt something only she lived with? She felt like an accomplice simply for knowing about the truth of this all. How did Lazarus manage to hold his tongue? 

"Then what will you have us do, Majesty, capture her and have her tortured? Or thrown to the people who lost their children to the lottery system and her torn apart?" Lazarus asked with a tone of voice that only frustrated Kelsea more. 

"We don't even know if she survived Row's attack," Kelsea muttered quietly. "But if she did I suppose I'll have to ask her myself," Kelsea added in a softer tone. She hated admitting defeat but she could not force the Mace. Nor would she even if she could make the sapphires work their magic. And she wasn't sure it was possible anymore. The feeling was both vulnerable, the idea of relinquishing the power she had sacrificed so much to harness. And yet there was also some relief, the fear of losing herself to the destruction she could manifest or of being eaten alive by her own magic was gone. If she destroyed herself now she could be the only one to blame. 

"That does bring up a question I had for you, Majesty," Lazarus's voice was less stern now. Kelsea looked back at up at him.

"Who was Rowland, Majesty?"


	9. Remembering Rowland

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kelsea gives Lazarus the explanation he's been waiting for as she remembers Row through Katie's eyes and her own. Katie reflects a bit on her friendship with Row almost three hundred years ago.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains a point of view switch from Kelsea to Katie, I felt this would make the most sense in terms with this fic and the canon material as to not write a chapter just reflecting on Row in only his canon appearances.

"When I first saw Rowland it was before the invasion, he appeared in the Keep- in my fireplace," Kelsea held her breath for a moment. She watched as The Mace furrowed his brows in concern. A breach of security. 

"He appeared in the fireplace- fire was the only way he could appear in The Keep," She paused, trying to explain this to someone who didn't already understand- like Gavin or the Red Queen was a big undertaking. 

Rowland Finn, the boy who had come and sit down next to a weeping Katie during recess. Even as a child he had a way of putting people at ease. He'd reassured her and they had been friends ever since. Had Row meant it? Had he actually cared for Katie or had it all been a selfish desire for her? 

Kelsea remembered it all through Katie's eyes- as vividly as if she had been there. Walking by Row's side as the sun kissed their skin warmly in the afternoon light. Row walking with his hands in his pockets and his chin tilted slightly upwards towards the sky. 

They were still children, really. Their teenage years had brought on a flurry of female admirers who flocked to Row's side at any given chance. But Katie didn't really mind- aside from the occasional irritation or interruption. Katie thought many times that their relationship was above sex, Row valued her more than that. And now was no exception - Katie watched as Rowland walked ahead of her, taking his hands out of his pockets and sitting down on the grass. He stretched out his lean legs and looked back over his shoulder at Katie. 

Katie caught up and sat down next to the young man, looking out at the pond in front of them. The sunlight played brightly across the surface of the water as the breeze sent gentle waves lapping against the shore. Row's brown eyes stared out ahead of him- sharp and dark. 

"Hey-" Katie reached over and slapped a hand playfully against Row's back. The boy shook his head and looked up suddenly. "You looked like you were about to go into a coma," Katie laughed and watched Rowland roll his eyes. 

"I was just thinking," Row shook his head a bit playfully- the sunlight playing against his dark locks of hair as they were tossled in the breeze. 

"About what?" Katie stretched out her legs for a moment before letting herself fall back into the grass. She stared up at the clouds moving about lazily above them. 

"Don't you wish we knew more about the crossing?" A bit of frustration tinged Row's voice as he continued to stare out at the pond. Katie wondered for a moment if he was imagining the vast ocean their parents had crossed over. Katie furrowed her brows for a moment before closing her eyes. 

"Don't we all? But there must be a reason they don't talk about it," Katie mused quietly. Of course, she was curious. Weren't they all? But when the crossing and the pre-crossing were mentioned a deep hurt often flashed across the eyes of the adults. Whatever the pre-crossing world had been like, it had been bad. 

"They're keeping us in the dark!" Row blew a strand of his hair off of his forehead before laying back in the grass. He glared up at the sun- the bitterness in his voice surprised Katie a bit. 

"Row- don't you think they're just trying to protect us?" Katie turned over on her side to face Rowland who did the same thing. His handsome face looked frustrated - tired. And laying across from him like this was almost like they were lovers or something. Katie rolled back onto her back and looked back up at the sky. 

"Or maybe they're just hiding stuff from us so we can't do anything any differently here. What if it's because they regret coming here?" The curiosity and irritation in his voice were undeniable. When Katie looked over she saw that Row's hands were balled into fists. Katie knew that Row ad his many issues with the way the town was run. But he was a headstrong young man. Katie was pretty sure that most young men Row's age thought they knew everything. But when he got like this Katie couldn't help but feel a bit disturbed. Row wasn't the same as other know-it-all teenagers. 

"Or maybe they could be right, Row," Katie knew that would piss him off so she said it playfully. Reaching over she punched his shoulder playfully- watching as the sharpness in his eyes softened into something more cheeky and playful. He rolled onto all fours- shooting Katie a brief smirk before pouncing on her playfully. Katie played along, she knew that she was the only girl in town who could fool around with Row without ending up naked. As she shoved Row back down into the grass and for a moment she worried about grass stains on her pants. Her mother might scold her but Row would think that was ridiculous. 

It was these moments that Katie enjoyed the most. When Row wasn't scheming or striving to be better than the rest of their community. Times like these where Rowland actually let his guard down- no controlling mother no fawning girls or rivals. When it was just them he didn't have to put on a show. 

Katie watched as Row leaned back- his legs sprawled out in front of him and both hands in the grass. He panted lightly and pushed back his considerably messed up hair. 

"I wish you'd worry less about all that, Row," Katie blurted out. But then again she was always the most honest with Row. She watched as he furrowed his brows and huffed, looking to the side. 

"You don't get it," Row muttered but he didn't meet her eyes. 

"You know that isn't true, Row," Katie countered but her voice was quiet. She saw his face flicker with irritation for a moment. But he must know deep down- that it was true. She knew him best out of everyone they knew. She watched Row stand up and brush himself off, little bits of grass falling around him. 

"I should go, if I stay out too late she'll get upset," The condescending tone that came out when he spoke about his mother couldn't fool Katie. That wasn't why he was leaving. She followed suit and stood up, brushing herself off as she watched Row start walking. 

"That's never stopped you before," Katie commented as she pushed her hair back. 

"Yeah, I know," Row stuffed his hands into his pockets as he continued walking. Katie observed his lean form from behind. She knew it wasn't what he wanted to hear. 

"Ans you know- Row, I think you would be happier too," Katie swallowed. It wouldn't be the first time they fought, not by a long shot. She watched as Row stopped, standing still for a few moments but saying nothing. 

"I'll see you around, Katie," Rowland's voice sounded deadpan- uninterested. That's what Katie should have expected. 

"See you," Katie watched as Row continued to walk ahead of her and she decided it would be best for him to create his distance. 

Katie watched the sky light up in vibrant oranges and yellows- smeared across the horizon like a painter's oils. Across the dirt pathway, she caught a glimpse of Johnathan Tear- probably making his way home from the library. He was handsome and closer to Katie's age but in a much softer way than Rowland. He had his mother's dark hair and pale eyes that were all too similar to William's. And yet Katie always noticed his eyes seemed sad and distant beyond his years. Or maybe his eyes were just tired from reading too much. 

Row always made fun of him- whispering quick little one-liners in Katie's ear. But every once and a while Katie thought that the two were more similar than Row realized. Sometimes just the way Johnathan walked or a gesture at one of the town meetings. 

Katie quickly snapped out of her thoughts when Johnathan turned around, only halfway and met her eyes. Did he notice her staring at him? Or was this one of those strange moments that only happened around William?

"Have a good night, Katie," Johnathan shot her a smile that was gentle and almost knowing. 

"You too," Katie gave an awkward little smile and wave before wasting no more time getting home.

Katie might have eaten her dinner more quietly than usual that night. And she couldn't help but wonder if anyone else had ever noticed what she did about Row and Johnathan. 

More alike than they knew. Katie rolled over and pulled her covers over herself. Maybe it was better not to think about it too much. 

Kelsea leaned back in her armchair and watched The Mace's face.

"Of course, I still don't understand why he hated all of the Tearling so badly, perhaps he could only enjoy what he controlled," Kelsea sighed. "But I can only imagine that he was just an extremely bitter person- a vengeful person."

"Sometimes someone who is bitter and miserable become the most dangerous type of people, Majesty, but I don't think there was much humanity left in that thing anyway." The Mace stood up and stretched his legs. 

"No, I reckon you're right Lazarus, he gave up what humanity he had for something else," Kelsea said as she stood up. For a moment she wished there was some form of an afterlife- if only to get the chance to question Row one last time. 

Or maybe he was just a resentful young man and there was nothing more to it. 

"I'll see you at dinner, Lazarus," 

"Of course, Majesty,"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was challenging for me to write, especially as I tried very hard to keep Row and Katie in character. I hope that I was able to do so while exploring Row's character for both the people who like Row and the people who dislike him. In this flashback I wanted it to show Row's turmoil but also the fact that he could have changed his mind and his ways but chose not to despite that. I really hope this chapter wasn't too boring or OOC, and I thank you for reading it.


	10. The Disgraced Queen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kelsea makes a trip to try and find closure with the queen who came before her, if she can find her.

Kelsea rolled over in her bed only to feel her knee bump into something under the covers. She opened her green eyes suddenly only to see Pen who was already waking up across from her. He was rubbing one eye and the other was still foggy with sleep. She'd gotten so used to sleeping alone in the dungeons of Mortemese she'd almost forgotten how it was to have someone beside her. 

"Mornin'" Pen mumbled quietly before sitting up. The blankets slid down his chest and crumpled around his waist in layers of fabric. 

"Don't tell me you haven't been getting enough sleep again," Kelsea teased quietly- almost a whisper. She watched as Pen rolled his eyes. But she didn't mean it- she knew this time around her guard wasn't seeing anybody else. It wasn't quite their old routine that they were falling into but Kelsea didn't mind. Though the lack of any real privacy was difficult - trying to relax and fall into bed with Pen while knowing Elston was just in the alcove nearby. But Kelsea figured a lack of privacy as a queen was something she'd have to get used to. 

Kelsea reached over and grabbed her robe, pulling it around her body as she slipped out of bed. She looked over her shoulder to see Pen getting out of bed to pull his trousers on. 

"I'll be eating breakfast here since I imagine Lazarus will use his last opportunity to try and dissuade me," Kelsea sat down at her mother's old vanity. She started brushing through her long dark hair. Without Lily's overwhelming beauty her long hair was a more important physical asset. But Kelsea still tried not to think of it- she never wanted her beauty to become too important to her. The beauty she had borrowed from Lily was just that- borrowed. 

"That's true, he will try to change your mind, but that's nothing you haven't dealt with before," Pen shrugged and Kelsea felt him put a hand on her shoulder. 

"I'll send for breakfast to be brought here," Pen said as he let go of Kelsea's shoulder and pulled his tunic over his form. 

"Please do," Kelsea responded while working out a knot in her hair. She could hear Pen gathering up his things to leave and head back to his own quarters to prepare for their journey. Kelsea watched him through the mirror as he tugged on his boots and pushed a hand through his brown hair. He started moving towards the door and Kelsea turned around and crossed her arms, "Leaving so soon?"

"Oh, of course, your Majesty, how could I?" Pen asked sarcastically as he walked back over to Kelsea. 

Kelsea let her now rounder face be cupped in Pen’s hands as he bent down and pressed a kiss against her lips. She closed her eyes for a moment before letting him go. Kelsea heard the door close shut and stood up from her vanity, walking into her closet. Today she wouldn’t be wearing one of her typical black dresses. Today she would be wearing something more similar to what she wore when she first left the cabin with her guards. Though the clothes from that day had been stained and ruined by the bloody injuries she had sustained, she still thought of that day as she pulled on her dark leggings. She sighed as she pulled on a pair of looser trousers over them and tugged on her pine-colored boots. The very same ones she’d been wearing when she first arrived. Looking in the mirror, she looked more like a woodsman than a queen but that was the point. She tucked her two sapphires into her clothing as she tied up her hair into a tightly woven bun. 

In the time that she had been back at The Keep Kelsea had been allowed in on more secrets. Even if they were just little things, like stone compartment The Mace had shown her in the floor of her closet. Kelsea carefully opened it, pushing the stone cover aside, cringing slightly at the sound of stone scraping against stone. Just as she expected there was nothing inside, though still she had been curious if her mother would have left anything there. Not that her mother knew Kelsea was going to be separated from her in the first place. 

Kelsea moved back into the rest of the room, grabbing Row’s crown which sat next to her bed. The many sapphire set into the silver glistened in the morning light that streamed through the windows. She grabbed it up and returned to the closet, setting it down in the stone compartment. Something this dangerous shouldn’t be left out while she was gone, and she wasn’t taking it with her. She slowly covered it up, watching the winking sapphires disappear under the stone. She wasn’t sure if anyone else would be able to ever use the crown, hell she wasn’t sure if she could use it again. But it wasn’t a risk she was willing to take. Kelsea moved the closet rug back over and stood up straight. As she returned back to her main chambers she saw Andalie letting herself in, a tray laden with tea and breakfast in her arms.

But there was something in her pale grey eyes that was different, something Kelsea couldn’t quite put her finger on. They had seen each other much less, Kelsea knew her daughter was fighting a deadly infection and Kelsea knew she needed time with her. She wouldn’t want to get between the woman and her daughter, Kelsea was able to look after herself after all. “Andalie?” Kelsea asked.

Andalie set down the tray and turned towards the queen, her shoulders relaxed. “Oh majesty,” Her voice was softer than usual and Kelsea suddenly found herself in the woman’s embrace. It took her a moment to realize before wrapping her arms around the other woman. She just stayed quiet, deciding to let Andalie talk when she was ready. 

“Her fever is gone, Majesty,” Andalie breathed out and it reminded Kelsea of when they first met. This was a woman that would do anything for her children, she would die for them, she would kill for them if she had to. 

“Andalie, that’s fantastic to hear,” Kelsea let herself break into a smile, she’d been visiting the girl here and there when she could but she had been very busy, setting up the council, getting the message out, managing the repairs of the city and trying to get ahold of a death toll. Kelsea put a hand on Andalie’s shoulder, she could only imagine the relief the woman was feeling. Kelsea felt like there was a weight off of her shoulders and it wasn’t even her daughter. 

"And what does the doctor say?" Kelsea asked. 

"Well she's been improving and she hasn't had a fever for two days," Andalie spoke and for a moment she wiped her eyes and Kelsea realized a bit late that she had been tearing up. 

"So she's in the clear?" Kelsea dared to ask.

"It would seem so, Majesty," Andalie sighed and stepped away from the young queen. The past few weeks had been beyond stressful with worrying about Aisa, especially when she first got Aisa back when they had no idea if she would live or die. The only bit of relief came when that strange masked man arrived with rare herbs and medicines usually only obtained by the elite and wealthy. But Andalie knew just from "seeing" that he was a man of many places and many resources. 

"My apologies, your Majesty," Andalie nodded as she regained her composure. Kelsea shook her head, there was no reason to be sorry. She would say that but she was sure that Andalie already knew- and when she saw Andalie's smile Kelsea knew she was right. 

"I'll leave you to your breakfast, Majesty," Andalie smoothed out a couple of wrinkles in her gown before she made her exit. Without a doubt, she already knew Kelsea didn't need anything else. 

Kelsea took her seat and sipped her tea which was made exactly the way she preferred it. She had been planning this journey for over two weeks now since she had visited her "mother's" tomb. Though of course it had been planned in secret with her guards, and now the sun was rising and today was the day. Kelsea hurried along with her breakfast- it would be a long ride- and she would need her strength even if she didn't feel like eating right now. After all this time thinking about what she would say she still wasn't sure what she would actually do when they arrived. Perhaps it was best to take it step by step- she would have plenty of time to think during the ride. Kelsea finished her meal and washed up- taking one last glance in the mirror. Would she even be recognizable? 

"Elston are you ready?" Kelsea called out and immediately heard Elston pushing through the curtain. 

"Of course, Majesty," Elston was all armored up- grey cloak and all. Kelsea pulled up her own hood. 

The rest of her guards were also ready to go when Kelsea met them in the hall. Kelsea followed behind The Mace silently since he had insisted on smuggling her out of The Keep secretly. Just as an added security measure, and if it got Lazarus to agree to the trip then Kelsea would gladly go along with his plan. Kelsea stayed between her guards even as she mounted her horse. She glanced around at her guards before they began to head out of The Keep. Kelsea kept her head dipped down slightly- keeping herself concealed under her hood.

Their ride started off quietly- the morning air was cool and damp. Somewhere Kelsea could hear morning doves cooing to each other. As the hours rolled by the cool morning air warmed into a hot afternoon. It was strange not worrying about Mort hawks or an ambush of assassins in wait. 

By the time evening rolled around Kelsea eagerly dismounted her horse, she could feel bruises blossoming under her skin from sitting in the saddle for so long and she was afraid she'd walk bow-legged from being so sore. She caught a smirk on Dyer's face, no doubt her guards had noticed her limp. "Feeling a bit sore, Majesty?" Dyer teased as he began to set up camp with the others, Kelsea, on the other hand, was finding a place to sit down and stretch out her sore legs. 

"I'm not so well adjusted to long days in the saddle as you all are," Kelsea rolled her eyes but she wasn't really mad, she flexed her booted feet back and forth- trying to relieve the tension in her legs. She groaned quietly and watched her guards as they began setting up the tents for the night. Kibb was working on getting a small fire started. 

Kelsea leaned back against the bark of a tree as she listened to her guards laughing and trading stories around the fire, she always did more listening than talking, it was good to pay attention, one learned the most that way. It wasn't that she didn't have her own stories, she had plenty of good ones by now but many of them were ugly memories. And her guards knew that, she might tell a bold tale of killing the Red Queen to her people but the reality of how she felt was different. It wasn't a victory, it had been a mercy killing and poor memory. So she was content to listen to their jokes and stories until she decided she'd better get some rest, she would need it for tomorrow even if danger never met them on the road. 

In the privacy of her little tent, Kelsea changed into something more comfortable and wrapped the blankets around her. She might not be feeling cold now but by morning the air would chilling again. She curled up on her side and for a moment she pressed her hand against the two sapphires on her chest. All those years they had done nothing for her mother, and maybe now they would be like that for Kelsea. 

The morning was even colder than Kelsea had expected and she began getting dressed as soon as she could see clearly. Already she could smell something being heated over the fire. But she found herself being even more quiet during breakfast, she was distracted and her guards noticed, she kept catching them staring. The Mace had his brows furrowed and Kelsea could read the concern on his face even if he was trying to be aloof. 

The day was considerably more grey than the last. Kelsea pulled her cloak tighter around her form as the shape of the old house came into view, alone on the horizon. Only the long grasses that whipped against the legs of their horses and the trees that bent over the edges of the forest joined them. It may have been one of the tensest silences Kelsea had experienced, and it was certainly the worst since she had finished Rowland. Kelsea drew in a sharp breath as she dismounted her mare and swallowed as Pen began tying the slip knot with the reigns. 

The Mace stepped up to the door, pausing for a moment before rapping loudly against the slightly chipped wood. He knocked loud enough that Kelsea could feel the vibrations as she stood beside her captain of the guard. She frowned, anyone inside would have heard that, and yet there seemed to be no stirring from within. 

''Lady Chilton!" The Mace's voice bellowed and Kelsea frowned at hearing her mother's alias. The Mace turned towards Kelsea, his fist still resting against the door. "Do you still want to go in, Majesty?" He asked more quietly than he spoke usually. 

Kelsea nodded, and stood back at The Mace sent the door flying open with a loud bang. She let Lazarus and Kibb enter first, she could hear their heavy footsteps against the flooring and waited for them beckon herself and the others in. Kelsea waited impatiently as her guards cleared the rooms before allowing her to step in. She tapped her pine boot anxiously against the floor until she felt Pen's palm press against her shoulder. She was in the midst of finding something to say to him when she heard Lazarus call out from upstairs. 

"I found her!" 

Kelsea turned on her heel and began hurrying up the stairs, Pen was shouting warnings at her, telling her to wait. But Elston let her in and soon as she was through the door Kelsea felt her shoulders slump. There being held by her arm was her mother, looking startled but certainly alive. Kelsea hadn't realized she was holding her breath until she released it. She watched the woman step aside from The Mace who released her arm and stood stiffly behind her. 

"You were hiding," Kelsea realized out loud as she took in her mother's face more clearly in the daylight. Age and stress had left their mark but her beauty still shone through, just like the painting of her when she was younger. She must have been even more stunning in reality. No wonder all her guards had ended up in bed with her. She was still beautiful.

"Of course," Even as she spoke Elyssa looked nervous like she was waiting for something. "Everything has been falling to pieces, I can't just open the door to anyone," She mumbled and Kelsea noticed the way she was staring. She must have noticed the change in her appearance, she seemed confused but not ready to admit it. Like she was still trying to figure out if her eyes had deceived her or not.

"You've been hiding for a while," Kelsea noted, curious to see if her mother would address the comment or not. She caught a glance from Lazarus, her sharp tongue was never lost on him. 

"Well after those things came, I don't know what to expect," Elyssa swallowed. She pushed a bit of her blonde hair over her shoulder. Age had run her fingers through the woman's locks, leaving strands of hair silver and white interwoven through her hair. Though Kelsea reasoned the stress and fear of assassination may have something to do with it as well. 

"Those things?" Kelsea asked though she had an idea of what her mother was trying to describe. 

"They were like people-children but they were twisted and swollen," Elyssa's eyes flickered with genuine fear at the memory. "They came over the hill, running through the grass but they didn't move right, and then they stopped and just started, ah convulsing," 

"They died didn't they?" Kelsea asked as Elyssa edged closer to Kelsea. 

"They must have, but I didn't see it, I hid here, I tried to block myself in, when I did go out again they were rotting in the field," Elyssa swallowed and Kelsea bit her lip. Whatever happened it sounded like a gruesome discovery. Kelsea found herself feeling pity, even after all her anger at this woman, seeing her afraid and disturbed by Row's children struck a cord with her. 

"I can assure you, they won't be returning, Lady Chilton," Kelsea sighed and found herself glancing out the window at the yellow-green fields that surrounded the home. Elyssa looked unsure but she nodded. For a moment Kelsea wondered why she seemed so hesitant about approaching her, but then she remembered the way she had lost her temper the last time they had seen each other. 

"Kelsea, can't you call me 'mother'?" Elyssa's voice was quiet but almost pleading. "I almost didn't recognize you when you came in," She admitted and Kelsea felt herself stiffen as her mother's hand touched her face. A brief look of disappointment crossed Elyssa's face and it wasn't missed by Kelsea. She had noticed that she wasn't pretty the way she remembered. A woman as beautiful as Elyssa and her daughter hadn't inherited her looks. And looks were very important to Elyssa. 

"Carlin was the one who raised me, and if anyone is to be called my mother it should be her," Kelsea's words came out colder than she had intended. Elyssa looked like she had been stricken even though Kelsea hadn't moved a muscle. Her blue eyes went wide with hurt and then irritation, she still held the entitlement of a queen if nothing else. 

"Then why did you come here? You must be busy," Elyssa retracted her hand from her daughter's face. Her voice was tinged with venom, ever so slightly. The Mace took a step closer to her, the tension in the room was growing. Kelsea felt Pen lightly grab her arm, not enough to actually hold her yet, but enough to tell her he would be ready to retrain her if he needed to. Normally Elston would be in that position but since they were all away from The Keep their usual posts had shifted a bit. 

"I came to see if you were alive, and go from there," Kelsea admitted. "I figured we had unfinished business, don't we?" She tried to catch herself from being too antagonistic but it was difficult. She wanted to lose her temper again and scream at her mother, but she also wanted to burst into tears and sob and demand answers or take pity on her mother and make amends. Maybe she just didn't know what she wanted. 

Elyssa raised an eyebrow, she was clearly skeptical. Maybe she was just as conflicted as Kelsea was about this whole thing. She was happy to see her daughter but irritated at the disapproval of her successor. 

Kelsea sat anxiously as she waited for Elyssa to return, she could hear the quiet sounds of dishes being gathered in the kitchen. She could hear low voices talking quietly. Kelsea was unable to make out what they were saying but she was sure that was the point. Whatever The Mace was saying to Elyssa he didn't want Kelsea to hear. Kelsea frowned and looked over at Pen. Out of all her guards, on this particular mission, he looked the most relaxed. He, like Kelsea, was the only other person who didn't know the former queen personally. Whatever guilt or discomfort they were feeling right now he was immune to. He sat next to Kelsea, awake but with his eyes closed- his shoulder touching hers. Pen must have felt her looking at him because he opened his brown eyes and returned her stare. 

"Ah, sorry Pen, I was just-"

"It's fine," Pen waved her off and that handsome smile graced his face. "It'll be fine, Kelsea," He spoke her name more softly. He just about never said her name around other people and hearing it said so gently like that took Kelsea off guard. She nodded and felt Pen place his hand on her shoulder. "After all, you survived the Red Queen, you can definitely handle your mother," Pen winked before taking his hand off her shoulder. 

"Trying to have tea and being civil with my mother might be more difficult than facing the Red Queen, Pen," Kelsea muttered under her breath and watched Pen crack a toothy grin. Behind them Kelsea heard Dyer coughing, he must have thought it amusing. 

"Do you like cream in your tea?" 

Kelsea looked up to see her mother holding a tea tray laden with teacups and beautiful silverware before she set it down on the table in front of them all. Kelsea blinked and reached for a teacup, "It's alright, I can get it," 

"No, I'll make it for you," Elyssa took the teacup Kelsea was reaching for and began pouring the steaming tea into the cup, "So is that a yes to cream?" 

Kelsea nodded and waited for her cup, she was surprised by the little action but maybe her mother was trying to be a mother. She took the cup offered to her and felt her fingers brush against her mother's fingertips as they passed the object between them. She peeked at the woman above the rim of the teacup as she passed out tea to her guards.

"You're a new guard, aren't you? What are you called?" Elyssa smiled as she handed Pen a piping hot cup of tea. The man dipped his head politely as he accepted it, leaning back into the futon he and Kelsea sat on together. 

"My name is Pen, Lady," Pen returned the smile but Kelsea could see just a hint of discomfort on his face, but she and Lazarus might be the only ones who noticed. Kelsea was slightly amused, Pen was a handsome man and older than herself, no wonder her mother seemed so friendly towards him. Perhaps somethings never changed. The woman sat down in an armchair after finishing handing out tea and she crossed legs, in a somewhat sultry position that both did and didn't surprise Kelsea. What did she expect in a room full of men? The woman sighed and her shoulders melted in her chair a bit.

"I suppose I was never cut out to be a queen, looking back on it all," Elyssa took a sip of her tea and Kelsea tried to keep her jaw from dropping. She hadn't expected her to admit something like that, but then again Kelsea wasn't sure what she should expect anyway. 

"I agree," Kelsea mumbled before noticing the flash in her mother's eyes. They were treading a thin line here, both of them. 

"I thought my whole life of you as a good queen, a noble person, but once I became the queen I felt like you more of my enemy," Kelsea admitted and she felt the room go quiet. Her mother just sat there, stirring her tea. 

"You kept so many secrets from me, and this entire time, I thought you were dead for nineteen years," Kelsea looked down and saw the tea in her cup trembling, her hands were shaking. She bit her lip, she didn't want to cry, she didn't want to look weak in front of this woman who signed a treaty that sold off her own people, who made sure everyone kept Kelsea in the dark her entire life. Who dismantled the law requiring children to go to school and allowed the Arvath to build a church within The Keep. But here she was, feeling hot tears roll down her face. 

"Majesty, it's alright," Lazarus's stern voice was tinted with concern and Kelsea quickly set down her cup so she could wipe her eyes. 

"Kelsea," Elyssa set down her own cup and straightened out in her armchair, Kelsea could see her blurrily through her tears. Kelsea wiped her hands on her cloak, the tears darkening the fabric. 

"Kelsea, I'm sorry," 

Kelsea stared at her own lap. Could her mother even understand how much she had to be sorry for? A carefree woman like her who didn't seem to think too deeply about anything? Could she ever understand what she had put Kelsea through? Kelsea doubted it and yet...

"Are you? Do you know how hard you've made my reign for me? And I've only just begun," Kelsea sighed and took a sip of her tea, trying to pull herself together. There was silence in the room for a few long moments. 

"I don't know, I know that when I left I was in constant terror for my life, and I thought you were going to be coming with me," Elyssa's voice was softer now, more genuine. 

It might not be much of an admission, but it was a start. It would never be an average mother and daughter relationship- it never could be. But maybe Kelsea could know her and maybe she could start to dim the fire of anger that burned in her heart towards this woman.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter ended up being a lot longer than I expected and I also trimmed out some of the fat but even so it still ended up kind of long. I hope it wasn't too boring, and I thank you for reading it.


	11. The Fetch Returns

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Fetch and his Party return to the Tearling after their stay in Mortemese

"I'm frankly surprised that you even let her take your measurements at all, Majesty," The Mace commented, a slight smirk on his scarred face.

"Well, I figured if dressmaking is what she's good at I may as well let her get to work," Kelsea shrugged and adjusted her crown as they made their way down the hallway. 

"But did you see the look on her face?" Kelsea asked, her tone became more casual. She smiled just a bit- maybe it was at her own expense but there was no point in hiding it. She'd seen the look her mother tried to hide as she measured around Kelsea's hips and waist. Of course, afterwards Elyssa smiled like nothing was wrong- since they were supposed to be making amends. It was Elyssa who'd offered to design Kelsea some new garments for her wardrobe in the first place. But Kelsea knew under that smile there were some comments about her less than slender figure. It didn't take magic sapphires to see that. 

"I did notice that, Majesty," The Mace sounded amused and for a moment the two of them stopped in the hallway and looked at each other. There was a bit of silence before Kelsea cracked into a grin. Thank goodness she had Lazarus. "Well, are you ready, Majesty?"

"Always, Lazarus," Kelsea said as she watched two Keep Guards open the doors to her throne room wide. She walked in, head held just a bit high as she entered the room. Kelsea took her seat on her throne. She crossed her legs and sat up straight and watched as guards opened the doors opposite of her. She leaned back as The Fetch and his men entered, their boots falling heavy on the floor, and their faces no longer hidden by masks. 

"I hear you've been busy as of late," Kelsea said and waited for them to sit down but they remained standing. 

"I'm not surprised that you have eyes in Mortemese," Gavin crossed his arms as he spoke. 

"Lazarus has eyes in the Mort, I just hear everything that comes down the pipeline, I'm surprised, I didn't expect you to take such interest in the stability of Mortemese," Kelsea admitted and watched The Fetch carefully. 

"You're suspicious of me?" Gavin raised an eyebrow, he swallowed and maintained eye contact with the queen. Lazarus and Elston tensed up on either side of Kelsea. 

"I would be foolish if I didn't have some doubt, after all, you know too well how betrayal caused Rowland Finn to gain so much power in the first place," Kelsea explained and she watched a flicker of pain flash through Gavin's eyes for a mere moment before vanishing. "And after your original request, it was not what I expected to see from you and your party," 

"So now I need to know, are you really here to collect your request?" Kelsea asked. If The Fetch was interested in grabbing power in Mortemese then it would be in his interest to remain cursed, to maintain this sort of immortality he'd been given. He could become the next Red Queen, and Kelsea's next enemy. But she'd shown only that he wanted the best for the Tearling. Still, Kelsea would be a fool to ignore the possibility. 

"We've come to get our curs removed, as you promised you would try," The Fetch's voice was firm. 

Kelsea stood up from her throne, swallowing. She wasn't sure if she would even be able to cure their curse or what would happen to Gavin and the others if she could. 

"I cannot guarantee anything," Kelsea reminded, though she was relieved that they did still want their curse removed. She watched as the men before her nodded. As she stepped down the stairs from her throne she felt the sapphires around her neck burn for the first time in two months, since she'd killed Rowland. Her heart started racing, she could only hope that it wouldn't take too much to break the curse, that it wouldn't drain all the life out of her before her work was done. She watched Gavin and his men kneel down, but the light from the sapphires had begun to glow, casting the faces of everyone in the room in a cold blue hue. 

The sapphires burned against her skin so hot she was afraid they would leave marks. The room now was bathed in blue, and it was harder for Kelsea to see as she reached out her hand and pressed it against Gavin's forehead. Her fingers felt hot and cold at the same time and the sapphires around her neck seemed to pulse with her heartbeat. 

The next thing Kelsea knew she was stumbling back from the last man of The Fetch's party, the world was a blue blur swirling around her. The sapphires around her neck suddenly went icy cold, cold enough that they felt like they were burning again. It felt like the breath was being stolen out of her body and then she felt herself fall into the armor of one her guards.

Kelsea groaned as she sat up, squinting she found herself back in her chambers, tucked into her bed. She sighed, rubbing her head which was still aching. She was alone in her room but she was sure someone was nearby. She leaned back against her headboard, "Elston?" 

Kelsea looked over to see the curtain move aside and her close guard step into the room. "Majesty, glad to see you're finally awake," 

"How long have I been out?" Kelsea mumbled as she started to get out of bed. She swayed as she did so and she put her hand against the wall to steady herself. 

"A bit less than a week, Majesty," Elston explained and in a moment he was at Kelsea's side assisting her to the bathroom. He stood outside the door with his arms crossed. "How do you feel lady?"

"Not well, I feel exhausted," Her voice was muffled by the door between them. There was a pause for a moment before she spoke again, "But did it work?"

"I believe so, Majesty," Elston said honestly. "The Fetch and his party haven't left The Keep yet, they've been waiting for you to wake up," 

"Let's keep it that way, I can do without Gavin breaking into my room again," Kelsea huffed as she washed her hands in the basin, taking a look at herself in the little bathroom mirror. Her mother had no shortage of mirrors, quite the change from never encountering one at Barty and Carlin's cabin. 

"Again?!" Elston's deep voice sounded startled and Kelsea smiled at her reflection. 

"Yes he happened to break into my bedroom and berate me once before the invasion, but it's alright," Kelsea opened the bathroom door and stumbled back over to her bed, Elston was steadying her arm as she did so but she didn't mind. She practically crumpled into her bed and she pulled some of the blankets up over her form. Andalie must have changed her into a nightgown while she rested, which she appreciated. But just because her guards had all unfortunately seen her naked before didn't mean she wanted to be in a state of semi-undress around them. Pen was the exception, but that was in private. That was different. 

"Call Andalie, I need water, and something to eat," Kelsea mumbled as she rubbed her forehead again. 

"I would, but I have a feeling she already knows, Andalie said she had a feeling you'd be waking up today," Elston explained. "But I will tell The Mace you're awake, we've been waiting," Elston moved towards the door and opened it, calling out into the hallway. Kelsea closed her eyes, her head aching at the sound of Elston shouting. Even if magic was intoxicating, even if had such great power, she didn't want to pay for it with her life. And she didn't want to pay for it like this either. Her whole body felt as if it was full of lead, her muscles burned and ached despite not moving. As if they had been drained of all their energy entirely. 

She was relieved when Andalie finally arrived with a tray laden with food and drink. She really did always know. Kelsea drank from her mug of water like it was the first and last water she would ever receive. Which seemed to both amuse and worry Elston and Lazarus who stood with his arms crossed at the foot of her bed. She ate more slowly, the last thing she needed was to make herself sick by overdoing it- then she could only imagine she'd feel worse for longer. 

"Lady, you don't owe anyone any favors, you are aware," Lazarus spoke, his voice was firm. Kelsea looked up from the bread roll she was working on. 

"Don't worry, Lazarus, there is no other curses I plan on removing," Kelsea sighed and rubbed her head. She closed her eyes for a moment, taking a moment to breathe before continuing her meal. 

"That's good majesty, because I don't want to see you wither away the way you described to me," The Mace let his broad shoulders slump just a little bit. Kelsea had explained to him how the power that seemed to come from those sapphires wasn't free, how William Tear had been drained by his own sapphire it sounded like a terrible way to die. Kelsea noticed the look of concern on his face and paused for a moment. 

"I promise that won't happen, Lazarus," Kelsea felt the need to reassure him again. "But I do need you to bring The Fetch here, I need to speak with him, but just him, please," Kelsea pursed her lips into a tight little smile. She watched The Mace nod before making his swift exit. Andalie handed Kelsea her robe and Kelsea smiled. "Thank you," 

Kelsea pulled her robe on as she sat in bed and tied the sash around her waist. She wasn't the image of a strong powerful queen right now, but at the very least she could have a robe over her nightgown. Not that she would catch Gavin's eye anyway. Kelsea almost snorted at the thought. "Andalie, you can take a seat if you want," Kelsea offered the other woman gently. 

"I'm fine, majesty, but would you like me to work on your hair?" Andalie asked as she moved over to the vanity. How had Kelsea not noticed before? 

"I must have terrible bedhead don't I?" Kelsea sounded a bit exasperated. She watched as Andalie smiled a bit as she held the hairbrush. "Well, then we might as well get started," Kelsea sat up a bit more as Andalie pulled a chair over to the queen's bed to start working on the long dark locks of her considerably tangled hair. 

"I'm glad to see you're awake," Gavin's smooth honey-covered voice broke through the room like a warm knife through butter. Kelsea opened her eyes to see Gavin leaning casually against the wall of her chambers as if he lived there. Why was Kelsea not surprised. 

"I think any debt I had to you for saving me from the Caden has been repaid," Kelsea half laughed but even as she did so she felt exhausted and couldn't help but wince a little. "But what I want to know is if it worked," Kelsea asked, she sounded clearly concerned. She didn't want to have given up so much energy just for the curse to remain. 

"You tell me," Gavin reached over, stepping towards Kelsea as he rolled up the sleeve of his loose shirt and held out his forearm to Kelsea. What she saw was ugly, a massive cut that had been dug into his arm had begun to scab over and heal in patches of dark purple and red. Kelsea frowned and looked up at Gavin's face. "You're healing normally," Her voice was quiet and despite the ugly wound, Gavin nodded with a slight smirk. 

"So, do you plan on going through with what you wanted all along, now that you can?" Kelsea asked and she wasn't sure she was ready for the answer, as was so often the case. 

"No, Kelsea, I figured now we really do only have one lifetime left, we'd best make it count for what happened all those years ago," The Fetch rolled down his sleeve. Kelsea could imagine the scar that wound would leave, not to mention how bad it must hurt. But if that's how Gavin needed to test it than so be it. 

"Well, I don't pretend to expect the people of the Mortemese to ever grow fond of me, I know too well of their hatred," Kelsea gave a little smile as she spoke. "But an alliance with the leadership of the Mort will. be beneficial for both kingdoms of people, and I will feel much relief," Kelsea sighed out. To have an ally in the place of power in Mortemese instead of a ruthless enemy was almost too good to imagine. Nothing would be easy- it would never be perfect but it would be leaps and bounds better for them all. 

"I and my men plan on doing the best we can for the people of Mort and the people of Tear, if we can," Gavin nodded at Kelsea's words. She leaned up and held out her hand to the man. Andalie paused while working on Kelsea's hair. There was a quiet moment in the air before Gavin took her hand and shook it. A truce between them, allies, maybe something like friends. 

"We'll have to be meeting more often then," Kelsea released his hand and leaned back. Even just the tiny act of holding out her arm to shake Gavin's hand felt the muscles in her arm burning and aching. 

"I look forward to it, Tear Queen," The Fetch straightened up and Kelsea managed to keep her eyes open just long enough to watch the man vanish through the door before succumbing back to her exhaustion. 

She'd get back to work soon, but for now, she just needed to rest.


	12. The Last Queen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kelsea spends her day going about The Keep on a rare day off from her duties as Queen, enjoying the company of friends old and new.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I sincerely hope you will enjoy the final installment of "Salvation of the Tearling", I poured my heart into this fic and I appreciate every read.

Kelsea pulled on the sleek new dress she'd received from Elyssa. It almost pained her to admit it but it was an excellent dress. It fit her well and she'd even made it dark in color, the way Kelsea preferred her dresses. It was a deep blue that almost seemed black at first glance but when the light caught it just right the blue came shining through the fabric. It was designed to fit her body type- supporting her and sculpting her figure just right. And no doubt it was meant to go well with the two glittering sapphires around her neck. And it would seem that her mother succeeded, Kelsea would give her that. Kelsea finished arranging her hair before grabbing her sapphire studded crown and carefully lacing it atop her head. 

She went out her door and put her weight on one hip as she looked over at her close guard. 

“Are done getting ready?” Elston asked gruffly. Kelsea rolled her eyes. “Don’t go turning into your mother now,” 

“I think I’ll be dead before that ever happens,” Kelsea scoffed as she began walking down the hallway. 

“Glad to hear it,” Elston said and Kelsea could have sworn she heard the hint of a smile in his voice but when she turned to glance at him it was gone. She wasn’t surprised. 

“You seem like you’re in a particularly better mood today, Majesty,” Elston commented and he watched Kelsea’s face out of the corner of his eye. 

“You mean to say that I am not always the picture of supreme joyfulness?” Kelsea asked sarcastically, raising an eyebrow as she did so. She shook her head, allowing herself to smile. “I’m just glad that the council members are going to be elected soon, despite all the obstacles we had,” Kelsea huffed but she was still happy and she couldn’t deny that. Slowly but surely they’d gotten the word out, explained this concept to everyone they could reach. And it had, well, a mixed reception to say the least. Some were glad, the voices of the people would be heard and not just the nobility- they would have a way of expressing themselves beyond simply violent outbursts against the crown or assassinations. Others thought it was waste of time, and others still thought it would be just another way for the nobility to weasel their way close to the crown. Kelsea knew that these speculations had their points but they had to try. 

“You know, Elston, when this continent was first colonized by William Tear and the others everything was decided by a general vote of the town’s adults,” Kelsea explained, she wasn’t sure if her guards always believed everything she told them about her visions but that was alright. “We’re a long ways away from a full democracy but you know this is the first step, evening things out, even just by small steps,” 

Elston nodded, and this time he actually let Kelsea see a glimpse of a smile on his rugged face. “A noble pursuit as always, Majesty, we may be able to pull this kingdom out of the mud yet, life here has been skewed for too long.” 

Kelsea knew he was right, and she knew from the graveness in her voice that he spoke from experience. She bit her lip. 

“I’ve been watching what you’ve been doing with the laws of this kingdom closely, and I appreciate what you’re doing for us,” Elston said and there was a quiet moment that followed. Was he or Kibb ever able to speak so “openly” like this to her mother? For some reason she doubted it, she was the woman who let the Arvath build a church within the keep grounds after all. And she seemed too careless to pick up on such a secret, still one could never be sure. She stopped in the hallway so she could face her guard more directly and looked up at the taller man. 

“It’s far from having it on black and white paper the way it should be, but I assure you that for as long as I am the Queen the injustices and atrocities committed by the Holy Father and his people will not be committed again without swift and harsh justice, his barbarism has no place in our Tearling,” She felt that bubbling anger that always seemed just below the surface coming up again. She'd heard reports of things that had happened while she was in the Mort. Two women dragged out of their home for living together and beaten in a public display of brutality. The Holy Father had men actively hunted down people suspected or accused of being homosexual to attack them. The idea this had happened in her kingdom was sickening as if the individual private lives of people were something to be accused of and treated as a crime. There was a moment of silence before Kelsea was startled by the sound of laughter. 

Kelsea looked up to see Elston laughing, genuinely laughing. Of course, she'd heard her guards laugh and tease her before but she hadn't made a joke. Elston’s big hand patted Kelsea’s shoulder and she wasn’t sure if she should laugh or cry. But then Elston stopped laughing and smiled at her for a moment, the genuine smile of someone who saved them for only the moments where they really meant it, someone who’d lived a hard life.

"I don't think we have to worry about you becoming your mother, Majesty," Elston took his hand off of Kelsea's shoulder and nodded for a moment. 

"Thanks, I hope not," Kelsea smiled a bit to lighten up the mood. Apparently, something she had said had struck a chord with Elston. "Let's get going then, I have a lot I want to do today," 

"Of course, Majesty,"

Kelsea carefully stepped over a particularly muddy puddle out on The Keep grounds as they made their way over to The Keep's own church. Looking up she saw the expensive cross that had once garnished the top of the building had been removed as she had requested. The precious metal it had been made out of could be used to fund more important matters than mere decorations. She'd asked for Arliss to put it with the funds going towards the repairs in the capital. She smiled to herself for a moment before knocking on the building's front door. When it was opened it was two familiar faces that greeted Kelsea, the two people who had been the most dedicated to one of her first requests as queen. But it took until now to get to it. Marguerite and Father Tyler stepped out of the way to let Kelsea step inside, followed by Elston. 

"Please, Majesty, come inside," Father Tyler smiled at her warmly as Kelsea looked around at the church. It looked vastly different than it had the first time Kelsea had toured the building. Now it was looking less like a church and more like a schoolhouse, the way Kelsea had wanted it to be. The space was being rearranged and divided in a way less suitable for mass preaching and more suitable for teaching. Looking around, Kelsea felt her excitement grow at the sight of bookshelves, slowly being filled with handwritten copies of books bound in leather and tied with leather straps or ribbons. She must have stayed quiet for a few moments too long because she heard Marguerite clear her throat. 

"Is everything alright, Majesty?" Even Marguerite's voice was beautiful, smooth, and dignified. 

"Oh, sorry, no everything is lovely," Kelsea stopped looking around to smile at Father Tyler and Marguerite who both seemed rather relieved. "I was just taking it all in, I see you've been hard at work, this will be lovely," Kelsea smiled brightly. She could imagine the children of The Keep staff coming here, a dedicated place for learning, keeping the spark of education- no matter how small- alive in their kingdom. 

"We're glad to hear you like the progress, Majesty," Father Tyler smiled and Kelsea was glad to see that he looked well, the color had returned to his skin and his eyes didn't look so tired and frail. Good, Kelsea was glad to see it. 

"You must be working hard, don't overwork yourselves, I know this is a bit of a passion project I've had in mind," Kelsea admitted. Maybe some would say it was even a vanity project- turning The Keep church into a school. But it was her mother who had allowed it's construction- ever letting the influence of the Arvath become stronger and stronger over their government, she doubted anyone would really complain about funding and building a school- other than the Arvath. Luckily the Arvath had much bigger problems to take on right now, rebuilding their Arvath for one thing, choosing a new "Holy Father" and all. So hopefully they would be out of Kelsea's hair for a while, she would take advantage of their preoccupation to keep pushing to make sure the Arvath and other churches would be subject to taxes. If they thought her trip to the Mort had made her forget her earlier goals they were mistaken, her plans had simply been delayed. 

"Well, we have had some help," Father Tyler smiled and looked towards an area of the church that Kelsea couldn't see and she waited as Andalie's children stepped out with a couple of the other Keep children. Glee, of course, was absent, she must be at her mother's side. Kelsea was surprised to see Aisa, especially considering what trouble she'd given Marguerite. 

"Ah, I see you have rounded up some extra hands," Kelsea smiled at the children who like usual looked both intrigued and intimidated by her presence. 

"Well once they found out it was a personal request from the queen they were more inclined to help," Marguerite said with a bit of a knowing smile. Kelsea nodded along. 

"Aisa, I'm glad to see you're still doing well, how have you been feeling?" Kelsea bent her knees under her dress a bit to make better eye contact with the girl. 

Aisa nodded, The Queen seemed different these days, always wearing her real crown set with sparkling sapphires that matched the one the Queen always wore around her neck. And today she wore a deep midnight blue that was both beautiful and regal. The Queen had already this presence that seemed larger than life and since her victories return from the Mort had multiplied this tenfold. She was always busy and determined-looking, hardened, and strong from whatever she had faced down in Mortemese. There were always stories and rumors about their queen destroying the Red Queen and escaping the mort with her brave guards. Though Andalie reminded Aisa that one could not believe all these stories, they were told by people who hadn't been there to witness it first hand. Still, Aisa found herself stealing peeks at the Queen as the woman turned the corner or left the library. "I've been feeling well, Majesty," Aisa finally found her words and did a little bow in front of her. 

"I am glad to hear it, and I'm thankful for all your help here," Kelsea reassured. "I want this school to be very special, and one day I hope there will be more schools like it in the rest of the Tearling," Kelsea explained to the kids, perhaps some of them valued their education if their parents had impressed its importance on them. But she was sure other students didn't like trying to sit still and listen to lessons. Though children toiling out in the fields might feel differently about it. 

"One day when I have my own children, I will have them educated here," Kelsea watched as some of the children's faces lit up, the idea they would be going to the same school that princes or princesses would someday attend. That alone probably gave them some bragging rights, if Kelsea had to venture a guess. 

Kelsea allowed herself to be led around the building by the children who were both eager and nervous to be giving the queen a tour of their work. She smiled and nodded along as they told her about how they'd been helping and here and there she caught glances from Marguerite and Tyler, both of whom seemed rather satisfied. Kelsea let herself be led to the door, watching as Father Tyler and Marguerite bowed again. 

"Thank you, again, I'll eagerly await the completion of this project," Kelsea smiled and held her crown in place so she could dip her head just slightly in a polite little bow. One new schoolhouse was a far cry from what they needed but it was a step in the right direction as they worked on repairing their kingdom, reassessing funds and manpower, and opening up new and fair trade with Mortemese. And despite the challenges, there were still other people who felt the same way Kelsea did, other people who valued equality, education. People like Father Tyler and Marguerite, people who would keep William Tear's dream alive, Carlin and Kelsea's dream alive. Kelsea would do well to remember that- hell- even Lazarus in all his stubbornness had changed his tune on Kelsea's desire to increase the literacy rate in the country. 

Kelsea stepped out and listened as Elston followed her closely, she had to lift the hem of her dress just a bit. The recent rainfall had ensured an extra soggy Keep lawn for the foreseeable future. 

Kelsea paused when they arrived under the stone archway that marked the entranceway to The Keep’s graveyard. She turned and looked at Elston.

“I’ll see you at lunch, Elston you are dismissed,” Kelsea smiled and watched as Elston nodded politely as he headed back. It was only a mere moment before Pen took his place as planned. Security probably wouldn’t be loosened up so long as Lazarus was the captain of her guard. She should expect it to be like this so long as she was the queen or so long as she lived perhaps. 

“How’s the repurposing of the church? You were going to take a tour of it today?” Pen asked as he kept step by step with Kelsea. 

"Better than I expected, their passion shines through their hard work," Kelsea looked up at her guard and raised an eyebrow. "What are you holding behind your back? Perhaps a dagger to finally be off with me?" Kelsea teased the older man and watched him roll his eyes. 

"No, but I thought you might want these for today," Pen handed Kelsea what he'd kept just out of her view. It was a wreath of white and green, pale white followers peeked out from deep greens that were woven to hold the structure together. Larger flowers in wide petals of pale peaches and whites. Kelsea looked at the pretty thing for a moment before looking back up at Pen. It wasn't a bouquet for her or something like that. Kelsea smiled up at him, he'd obviously gone out of his way to purchase this and it was perfect. Not flashy or obnoxious, polite respectful, and beautiful in its simplicity. 

"You didn't have to do this, I know you must have gone out of your way," Kelsea said quietly as she led the way into graveyard walking past the rain-dampened tombs. 

"I thought you would appreciate it, and she would too, if possible," Pen said quietly and didn't explain himself further. He stood by Kelsea's side as she stared down at the smooth stone of her mother's false tomb once again. Her face tilted downwards a bit for a moment before she sat down, the folds of deep blue fabric flowed over the stone like a dark river. She pressed her lips tightly together before leaning over to place the wreath under the engraving of her mother's name and memorial. But these flowers weren't for her. Maybe if somehow the woman buried here could see them she would appreciate their beauty and their meaning as a gift for her. But Kelsea was wary of such thoughts, ideas of religion or an afterlife seemed to folly to trust. To her it was more likely that these flowers were a gift for a woman who's remains laid underground and the flowers would wilt and fade like the body that once was. Kelsea bit her lip and frowned, closing her eyes. 

"Kelsea?" Pen's voice was even quieter than Kelsea had expected but she didn't say anything, she just shook her head. She was afraid if she said anything the tears she was holding back would come tumbling out. But when she felt Pen's open palm against her shoulder blade it didn't matter anyway. 

In a moment she was scooped up into Pen's lap crying onto the grey cloak of his shoulder, desperately trying to keep her voice down lest any lingering souls in the keep overhear her sorrow. She felt Pen's calloused fingers run through her hair, letting her sob it out, maybe it was the best thing she could do right now, get it out, and let it go. Pen didn't pester her about why she was crying, and for that she was grateful, it was hard to explain anyway, the grief she felt for her kingdom, her people, and crimes not committed by herself. And the sheer level of stress placed upon her shoulders, she'd been seeking healthier outlets but Andalie had reassured her a couple of times that letting herself feel these things was healthy.

Kelsea sighed and rested her face in the crook of Pen's neck, closing her eyes and pulling herself together against the warmth of his skin, wrapping her arms around his back against the folds of his draping cloak. 

"It's going to be alright, Kelsea," Pen mumbled as he adjusted the crown on her head ever so gently. 

"I know," Kelsea breathed out and lifted her face, wiping at her eyes gently. She didn't want to look like a red crying mess for the rest of her day, she didn't want to ruin her day right now. "Sorry, Pen," She half laughed though her eyes were still blurry with tears. She felt Pen clap her shoulder playfully.

"You're always sorry for the wrong things," Pen huffed but he remained sitting still with her, a few light droplets of rain began to spot on the tomb before Kelsea felt them falling on her skin. "Now no-one will suspect you of crying," Pen teased quietly, the light sound of rain falling intermingled with his voice. "We're getting plenty of rain as of late, aren't we?" 

Kelsea stood up with Pen and straightened out her dress as she watched raindrops caress the petals of the wreath before plopping onto the tombstone. "It's good, it means there will be a decent amount of fresh water for the city to use," She said quietly. 

"It's the least we can ask for right now," She pursed her lips into a brief smile. She paused blinking as a movement was caught in the corner of her eye. She looked over and saw a bluebird hopping about the grass near the gravestones. No doubt the little bird would enjoy finding the worms that the rain summoned to the surface. Its blue and orange form moved as if the creature was made of the air itself, stepping onto one the graves for a brief moment before glancing at the two people. It was still for a moment before taking to the air, a droplet of blue paint against a grey canvas. 

"Are you ready to head inside, Kelsea?" Pen asked, straightening himself out. Kelsea nodded and led the way through the tombs of her ancestors back into the halls of The Keep. 

Kelsea finished getting herself a bit freshened up before dinner, deciding to tie her hair back into a low bun to keep it out of the way. Andalie gently finished getting her hair to cooperate before stepping back from the vanity. 

"Won't you eat with us tonight Andalie? I know you eat with your children but it is only one dinner," Kelsea turned in her chair to smile at the other woman, who despite her extra senses seemed a little surprised to hear kelsea say it. "I even rounded up Marguerite to eat with us, so the table isn't entirely made up of men," Kelsea grinned a bit. 

"Are you throwing a party, your majesty?" Andalie raised an eyebrow. 

"Not a party, but I thought once and a while it would be nice if we all ate together, since we are a team here and frankly I enjoy your company," Kelsea explained. Nevermore than nowadays while Kelsea recovered from her dealings with The Fetch and repaired this kingdom where they nearly lost it all. Collectively, they were all experiencing a lot. 

"Well, I suppose I could show up, though I'll hardly be dressed like a queen," Andalie cracked a half-smile as she put away the hairbrush she'd been using to do the Queen's hair. 

"I hardly look like a queen most days, Andalie," Kelsea stood up and teased back. "And I am the queen, so there's that, and have you ever seen Dyer eat? Not exactly a graceful affair," Kelsea opened the door for herself and Andalie to pass through. 

Kelsea was happy to have Andalie walk by her side as they headed off to dinner with Elston following behind them. Even before entering Kelsea could hear voices and plates being shuffled around the dinner table and she opened the door to see Father Tyler passing around a bread bowl of biscuits for them to get started on. Marguerite was there, a rare distraction for her guards, who Kelsea was certain would already be stealing glances at her as she ate and looked away from them. 

Kelsea took her seat at the head of the table and looked over at the Mace as he sat in his usual spot beside her.

"Your majesty," His gruff voice greeted as he poured Kelsea her wine while she grabbed the bread bowl from Father Tyler and took a roll for herself. The affair of lifting the curse off of the Fetch and all of his men had been rather draining and even now she could still feel the effects. That would be her excuse to eat a little extra. She grabbed a second roll. 

"Lazarus," Kelsea returned as she sipped lightly at her wine. She wasn't shy about eating but she knew better than drink heavily, she was still a queen after all. Kelsea watched contently as everyone took their seats, Kibb was telling a thrilling tale that had everyone enraptured. But by the look on Andalie's face, she could only imagine how little truth there was in it. Kelsea had to resist the urge to laugh. Ewen was telling Pen about his most recent art piece and he was asking about trying to draw Kelsea sometime, and while Kelsea knew it wouldn't be the painting of her that would one day hang on The Keep's walls she would be happy to oblige him. Kelsea caught a knowing smile from Pen before his attention was needed again by someone else. 

Kelsea let Father Tyler bless their food before they ate, and while she didn't take part in prayer she stayed quiet. Sure it was her table but once in a while, it wouldn't hurt. But as the Father was speaking a strange thought occurred to her, here at the table, servants, guards, and even a priest- it was like a strange little makeshift family they had. A Keep family all dedicated to Glynn rule. Some odd little group they were but they were genuine, even Arliss who was probably passed out in bed right now with a cigarette hanging out of his mouth- even he in all his old pirate-y ways was honest about it. 

"Majesty?" Lazarus's voice snapped Kelsea out of her thoughts. She swallowed down the bite full of bread she'd been working on. She leaned back noticing that the main course was here, giving the servant room to set down her plate. 

"Ah yes, sorry, I was thinking," Kelsea looked at Lazarus who rolled his eyes for a moment before shaking his head for a brief moment. 

"That brain of yours never stops, does it?" He laughed for a moment as he leaned back in his own chair to be served and his wine goblet refilled. 

"No, I suppose it doesn't," Kelsea laughed, but a few hot cups of tea, a good book, and cuddling up in her blankets in the crook of her lover's arms certainly helped. She offered The Mace a smile and was surprised to see a soft, smile in return. Perhaps the softest expression she'd ever seen on the fearsome Mace. When the man reached over and touched Kelsea's hand on the table and for a moment she was reminded of the time he'd said he had wished he was her father. She blinked quickly, hurrying to wipe away the flurry of tears that had appeared in her eyes before anyone saw but her sharp-eyed guards were sure to have noticed already. 

"Sorry, I guess my mind really never does stop," Kelsea grinned as she finished wiping the tears from her green eyes. With this group of people, with this team on her side, she would keep persevering to be the best queen she could for her people. To be the best ruler that the Tearling had seen since William Tear's democratic influence over their sapling of a town. And with the help of these people around her and the trust of her people hopefully, there would be no need for another monarch.

She would be the best, and the last Queen of the Tearling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for taking the time to read "Salvation", I spent a lot of time working on this fic, trying to create something that other fans could also enjoy after finishing the series. The support I have gotten whole writing it inspired me to work harder and to pour my heart into each chapter, the kind words I have received have really touched my heart and made my day. I truly appreciate every time someone has given this story a chance even if they decided not to continue reading it or perhaps didn't enjoy it, it really has warmed my heart. When I started writing this fiction there were only two other fanfictions for this series, and while another one has been uploaded since this one's begun our fandom is still rather small. To me, it makes me even happier to have the readers that have given salvation a chance since we are a tight-knit little group!
> 
> Thank you again for reading, I hope I was able to write something you could enjoy and I hope to write more for our fandom in the future. Sincerely, Blue Mushroom

**Author's Note:**

> If you've made it this far, then thank you! I would really appreciate it if you would leave a comment or critique. This is actually the first fanfiction I've ever posted so please leave your thoughts and any critiques I should consider moving forward with future chapters!


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